False accusations destroy lives.  And it doesn’t just destroy the life of the man falsely accused.   His parents, grandparents,  children, brothers, sisters …. can and will be impacted in ways which only those who love a falsely accused man will ever understand.  If you can imagine being shunned by  neighbors 10 years after false incest/rape/abuse charges have been dropped…

FALSELY ACCUSED.
Imagine losing your job and not being able to find a new one…even though the charges were dropped….Imagine being sued in civil court by an evil ex-wife and children determined to get the revenge they feel the legal system denied them (but really didn’t, since you did lose your job and you were arrested and on the news and humiliated and are being shunned and everyone is convinced you are guilty just somehow got off the hook).  Imagine spending all that money once again to defend yourself and imagine the pain you feel when your attorney advises you that you’d better settle out of court if you even want to retain one dime…

Imagine being too old to start over once everyone began forgetting…

Imagine watching all the money from years of hard work for your family (once the lawyers were paid, of course) disappear because you can’t find a new job. 

Imagine knowing you’d be turned down for a career position as the french fry guy at McDonald’s…

Can you even begin to imagine the nightmares – each and every night – from the 5 weeks you were refused bail because your ex lied and said you would try to kill her (in addition to the daily beatings, rapes, etc.)????

And worst of all, imagine that your children, whom you have loved so dearly -  have been trained in your absence while you were attempting to provide for them the best future you could – being molded by a vicious woman to lie, cheat, steal, and do whatever it takes to get whatever they want – and to despise and blame YOU in the process?  Imagine losing your children forever –

Imagine any and all of this – because it does and did happen.

My name is Rosemarie and I’m a proud member of NCFM.  I am now married to a falsely accused man.  It’s a nightmare which will only end when he finally passes away – and that’s exactly what she wanted.  Trust me on this one.

PS That was really poorly written; I can do  better but there is so much pain and rage inside.  I have just spent another night listening to the man I love cry out in his sleep.  My heart is broken and I didn’t even know the man when all this was happening…..If *I*, as an outsider at the time, feel this badly and this hurt and this much anger, how much more do you think the falsely accused man feels?

I know exactly the pain of losing a job over false accusations; I was fortunate that it didn’t go to court. People then wonder why some men are gay. That way at least both partners are equal in the eyes of the law.

Drew, I’m so sorry to hear that.    I hope you have had success in putting your life back together again – although from what I’ve seen, it’s damned near impossible.  What was lost by the accusations can never ever be regained.   If my husband has one peaceful night in all the rest of his life, it will be a miracle.   OK, so the bitch ended up in jail over a non-related offense, but she SHOULD have been in jail for making horrible false accusations.  Where is the outrage??

My heart goes out to you.

Although I realize that some men suffer the consequences of a falsley accused rape or sexual assault, in reality this issue is practically insignificant, especially when compared with the real issue: a system of violence towards women. Only 2% of all reported cases of sexual assault and rape are false, this is the same percentage of false accusations of every other crime. It’s even more important to note that only 10-15% of all sexual assaults are ever reported. The problem of violence towards women is only related to men in the way that men perpetuate the violence. Rape is a woman’s issue, 1 in 4 women will be raped or sexually assualted in her lifetime.

Hello,
My name is Steve, I am currently in a battle with my ex just to have unsupervised visits with my daughter who lived with me 10 1/2 months of her 14 month old life. The allegations started out with physical abuse and willful deprivation. Next came the drug abuse allegations. Now they have turned into child pornography, and sexual abuse on own daughter. I pray that someone will see through these lies.  Everytime that I refuse to pay for something (Like a party for her family at my daughters baptismal)another allegation emerges.
I live in Illinois and it seems that she can keep making the accusations and I have too pay to keep defending myself. I am guilty without evidence, until I prove myself innocent. I have spent all of my money and now am 35,000 in debt due to this, and it still is happening.
Our daughtert has special needs also and I think it would be much better to spend all of my money on her care, not just for the right to be a part of her life. WHERE IS THE JUSTICE???

I am currently dealing with an issue where my 17 year old son was accused of sexual harrassment at school, the only witnessess the girl and three of her friends (one of whom is a girl my son recently broke up with) The school took  6 days to conduct its “investigation” basically gave them 6 days to get their stories straight. Now my son who is a D1 football recruit is in danger of being expelled from school and missing his senior season of football. There is no evidence, no video, the teacher who was in the classroom when this supposedly occured saw nothing. How do you fight something like this?

Steve – my heart goes out to you.     I do understand – albeit vicariously – the pain, the torment, the nightmare.
My first suggestion is to research, research, research.  I do have a copy of Dean Tong’s book – somewhat useful.  I can’t remember which book.  I do know that my husband lost most everything he had by the time it was all over – first criminal charges, then civil charges (they couldn’t put him in jail for the rest of his life and get his money that way, so they sued). 

My husband used to be a wealthy man.  His money was meant FOR HIS CHILDREN as he is a modest man who requires little and worked very hard to secure the future of his children.   His ex wife and her minions stripped HIS CHILDREN of their college education – ironically, his children were her minions – and the police, and the DA and some radical women’s groups, and psychologists, and social workers……the list of the complicit goes on and on…

At the end, the children  only f-ed themselves over because now they have NOTHING – none of them have ANYTHING.    Not that  I care about them, because they all went along with this and filed charges and perjured themselves and have NO REGRET about it.

In *your* case, your daughter is not complicit and it breaks my heart to hear this story. She’s a baby and at least she doesn’t know about any of this while it’s going on but the damage her mother is doing to her – depriving her of a father – will eventually haunt her.

So tragic.

CrazyDrama – I’ll tell you what’s crazy. Giving a group of high school girls SIX DAYS to “get their stories straight” – meaning they can rehearse their lies during that time.

Unbelievable.

Your defense is in your post – he broke up with the girl.  Hell hath no fury.  Other than that, your son is at the mercy of those who believe that women don’t lie about such things. 

I wonder why men want to have anything to do with us anymore – it’s too dangerous!  I’m glad they do, but still I have to wonder.

Shannon -

Please come to my house and tell my shattered husband that false accusations are “insignificant” – if you dare. Of course, you’ll have to GET PAST ME FIRST!   And there’s fat chance of that.

Tell me, if you’re so concerned about women’s rights, why are you not fighting for MY right to not have MY life destroyed (albeit vicariously) via these horrible false accusations?  I’m a woman – OK, so you don’t think men matter, well I’m a woman so therefore my pain must matter to you, right?

Ooooh, sorry – my bad.   The last thing feminists care about are the rights of those who disagree with them – male OR female.

PS Shannon, dear?  You need to stop spouting the feminist line and actually do some research.  1 in 4 my a$$.

Shannon,
You claim that “Only 2% of all reported cases of sexual assault and rape are false” is in err. This ‘Canard has not only long since been disproved, the source of of the “2% False claim” has been exposed.
Edward Greer wrote a paper on this… I invite you to read it and educate yourself.

Now discussing your claim that “Rape is a woman’s issue, 1 in 4 women will be raped or sexually assaulted in her lifetime,”
a) there is NO reliably sourced data to support this… anywhere and
b) do you truly expect use to believe that 25% of the male population of the planet are rapists? Or are there like 2 or 3 professional rapists out there running around attacking women just to keep the numbers up?

Now… having said that, let me point you to some DATA (which I realize is inconsequential to fear mongers and “OMG IT’S A CRISIS!” harpies):
a) Per the United States Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, as published in their annual Child Maltreatment Report- the VAST MAJORITY of neglect, abuse and maltreatment suffered by our children is inflicted by their mothers (with the child father being the least frequent perpetrator of said neglect, abuse and maltreatment.
Don’t take my word for it, the data is available online at the US US DoH&HS website.
b) Review the US CDC (United States Centers for Disease Control) NVSR (National Vital Statistics Report), Vol. 56, No. 5, November 20, 2007 Table 1.
…and you’ll see that contrary to one of feminists cherished dictums
“More women are killed by Domestic Violence than any other cause in America“, that more women die from accidental causes than die from ALL forms of violence (ie Domestic or otherwise) combined, and in fact deaths caused by violence drop off the charts completely at age 45.

c) If you’ll review the National Hospital Ambulatory Care Survey data files you’ll find that contrary to another of feminists prized dictums,“Domestic Violence is the leading cause of injury to women between ages 15 and 44 in the United States – more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined”,
Survey data fil  that injuries to women caused by Domestic Violence (titled “Injuries purposefully inflicted by spouse or other intimate” rank far behind such mundane causativeas as ‘motor vehicle accidents’, ‘accidental falls’, ’sports injuries’,  etc.
In fact, in 1996 the NHACS published data placing DV injuries at #8 in line at 2.2%, a paltry 0.1% ahead of #18 ‘poisonous animals and plants’, #19 ‘hot substance or object’ and #20 ‘foreign body accidentally entering eye’…

COMBINED!!!.

d) Going back even further in history (merely to illustrate to you that this data is, AND HAS BEEN, known (i.e. despite feminists BS lies) to the 1985 US NIJ Family Violence Research Survey i.e. FVRS, males reported that women initiated family violence 44.1% of the time and women reported that they initiated the violence 52.7% of the time.
Yes, 23 years ago women admitted they initiated family violence almost 20% more often than men did.
Further, the US CDC has published data showing us that in families experiencing reciprocal violence women initiate the violence as often as the men, and in families experiecing non-reciprocal violence women initiate 3/4 of the violence.

Shall I continue?
I can.
I wouldn’t lie to you.

I’ll not only sit here and tell you you’re a lying *censored* and full of *censored*, I’ll tell you what the DATA is (as opposed to your cherished *censored* rhetoric) and I’ll tell you how and where to go look up that DATA.
For example:

* 29.9% of custodial fathers and 76.9% of custodial mothers receive a support award.
* 26.9% and 46.9% of non-custodial mothers totally default on support payments.
* 61.0% of non-custodial fathers and 20.0% non-custodial mothers pay support at some level.
* 10.2% of single custodial fathers and 66.2% of single custodial mothers work less than full time.
* 24.5% of single custodial fathers and 7.0% of single custodial mothers work more than 44 hours weekly.
* 20.8% of single custodial fathers and 46.2% of single custodial mothers receive public assistance.

Source:
Technical Analysis Paper No. 42 – US Dept. of Health and Human Services – Office of Income Security Policy.

Further:
* 90.2% of fathers with joint custody pay the support due.
* 79.1% of fathers with visitation privileges pay the support due.
* 44.5% of fathers with no visitation pay the support due.
* 37.9% of fathers are denied any visitation.

And read this one real carefully, it’s pertinent:

* 66% of all support not paid by non-custodial fathers is due to the inability to pay.

Source:
1988 Census “Child Support and Alimony: 1989 Series” P-60, No. 173 p, 6-7, and “US General Accounting Office Report GAO/HRD-92-39FS Jan 1992

If anyone else cares for a copy of the [Mythos Busted] file (from whence came this data) I maintain here, you need only email me at gunnerretired@hotmail.com asking for it.

Gunner Retired
F4J Georgia
NPRA

Gunner,

Thank you for responding to her, and Semper Fi.

I have a couple of additions:

#1. It’s even more important to note that only 10-15% of all sexual assaults are ever reported.

If they aren’t reported, then you are just pulling figures out of thin air, as there is no way to accurately calculate something that isn’t reported. Unless of course, you could be bothered to cite your sources as Gunner did.

#2. The problem of violence towards women is only related to men in the way that men perpetuate the violence.

Then please explain how the rate of domestic violence is the same in lesbian relationships as heterosexual relationships?

“Statistics regarding domestic violence against LGBT people are unavailable at the national level, but as regional studies demonstrate, domestic violence is as much as a problem within LGBT communities as it is among heterosexual ones.”

That is a direct quote from the NOW website: http://www.now.org/issues/violence/stats.html

Funny, even NOW is aware that DV, as well as sexual assault/rape is not something that only men do to women.

To all men being falsely accused. If you have nothing to fear take a lie detector test. I did and passed. Child protective services and local police backed off and I got my children back after 6-8 weeks. I am legally totally disabled due to 10 years of childhood rapes by adult males in two foster homes in California. Thirty years after the fact I sued the perpetrators and won in civil court. Not everybody becomes a perpetrator just because they were perpetrated against as children.

Wow… Two years ago I would have rolled my eyes at the stories of false allegations. But then I watched the life of the most gentle, kind man I know get ripped to shreds by a sociopath with unlimited funds to take legal action against him based on things she simply made up out of thin air. Even though the police testified against her, my fiance continues to live with barely any contact with his own children. He was the primary caregiver, took them to all doctor and dentist appointments, taught them to ride bikes, loved them the way a father should and helped them grow. He cries every night and it is TORTURE for all of us.

I had no idea the vicious power women have when they turn and twist the elements in the system meant to protect real victims of abuse.

Once I started sharing my fiance’s story with coworkers (I hesitated becuase i figured no one would believe me), each and EVERY ONE so far has a friend or a brother or is himself experienced in the area of having to defend against false allegations and losing his children as a result.

That last statement in the post… that the pain will only end when he passes. … it is a heartbreaking truth. I feel it for my man too.

I still keep quiet about it.

Contessa,

I’m so sorry you have to watch him go through that. And I’m appreciative that he has someone who is willing to be there watching him go through that.

Sadly, the crime of false rape accusation isn’t something that rarely happens. Please, if you have a story to share, please drop by the website I post regularly on, http://www.falserapesociety.blogspot.com, and if you are willing, please share your story with us. We are one of the few sites that are comitted to making sure that the issue of false accusations of rape are exposed.

When I have some free time, yes, I will do that. Thanks so much for the invitation. As far as awareness of the crime of false accusations, we have such a long way to go. Look at the comments made by Shannon in this thread.

Sadly, I can take no credit for awareness on my own. Had I not met up with this man, and done a LOT of research, I might be believing the same feminist propaganda. There are fair minded women everywhere – but we have to reach them. That’s why this organization is so important. Please – if you’re just stopping by, I encourage you to join. I know times are tough financially and I have to scrape for my dues as well (I’m late! AGH!) but it’s money well spent.

I thought our judicial system was fair. I had quite an eye opening. You do not need to give dates or have any evidence of rape in the state that I live in. An accusation is enough to send someone to prison. Guilty until proven innocent. Where is the justice? Where is the retribution for loss of freedom, respect, defirmation of character, going in debt to protect yourself against the false accusations. Laws should be severe for false accusations.

Contessa and Gunner,
As a feminist, I am an advocate for the rights of all women, whatever those rights may be. I am not fighting for women to be better than men, and to presume that I “don’t think men matter” is both audacious and ignorant. The definition of feminism, according to Merriam-Webster, is “: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes”, which means that by definition and practice I fight for the equality of both women and men. Most importantly, the fact that you, or any other person reading these messages, disagrees with me is irrelevant and doesn’t dictate whether or not I care about your opinions or feelings.

“feminism.” Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary. 2009.
Merriam-Webster Online. 3 May 2009

I do not pretend to claim that what has happened to your husband isn’t real or tragic. If your narrative is true then his situation is both unfair and unjust. Also, in context my use of the word “insignificant” refers to the percentage of cases that are false accusations and not to your situation. In fact, I do not deny or trivialize the experiences of any of you men or women who have personally experienced.
That being said, these few cases do not change the majority of sexual assault and rape cases. It is also important to note, Gunner, that I am speaking specifically of sexual assault and rape, not domestic violence or child custody. Those are a completely different and complex set of issues.
Here is the research you all desire, all of these facts are followed by the appropriate sources. Because unlike those you consider fear mongers and harpies, I value factual data, in fact, it is the only way to construct a convincing and valid argument.
• 1 in 6 women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime, and 1 in 33 men are sexually assaulted in his lifetime.
• Only 2% of reported sexual assaults have been determined to be false.
These facts are from the National Institute of Justice Website. http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/topics/crime/rape-sexual-violence/victims-perpetrators.htm#fisher
Fisher, B.S., F.T. Cullen, and M.G. Turner. The Sexual Victimization of College Women . Washington, DC: U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics and National Institute of Justice, 2000, NCJ 182369.
Koss, Mary P., and C. Gedycz, and N. Wisniewski. “The Scope of Rape Incidence and Prevalence of Sexual Aggression and Victimization in a National Sample of Higher Education Students.” Journal of Consulting and Clinical psychology. 55(1987), 162-70
Thoennes, Nancey, and Tjaden, Patricia. “Prevalence, Incidence and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings of the National Violence Against Women Survey.” U.S. Department of Justice, November 1998.
It is possible that you just don’t understand the definition of sexual assault or rape, this can make things very confusing. Let me clarify.
• Sexual assault: any act of sex where the actor has not obtained consent from the other person. Runs on a continuum from unlawful sexual contact to actual penetration.
• Rape: Sexual intrusion or penetration of the vagina anus or mouth of the victim. The weapon of intrusion used by the perpetrator may be a penis, tongue, finger or object.
• Consent: Cooperation in act and attitude. Knowledge of what is happening, intoxicants, such as alcohol, can impair a person’s ability to give consent. Submission due to fear is not consent. Having previous sexual relationship does not mean consent.
http://dictionary.law.com/default2.asp?selected=1718&bold=||||
Gunner, I am confused as to where I claimed that 25% of the male population was rapists? In fact nowhere in my comment did I make such a ludicrous statement. Also it is geographically impossible for 2 or 3 people to commit every sexual assault in America. I do not know the percentage of men who commit rape and will there for make no such statements about a specific number.
It is interesting that you refer to rape in a way that makes it seem like a game or quota by using phrases like “professional”, “running around” and “keep the numbers up”.
Steven,
I was incorrect in my range of rapes reported, these are the new facts.
• The Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) reports that the majority of rapes and sexual assaults perpetrated against women and girls in the United States between 1992 and 2000 were not reported to the police. Only 36 percent of rapes, 34 percent of attempted rapes, and 26 percent of sexual assaults were reported.
I don’t know how statistics are calculated from the reported percentage, and unless you do, you are unjustified in saying that the numbers come from thin air.
Rennison, C.M. Rape and Sexual Assault: Reporting to Police and Medical Attention, 1992–2000. Washington, DC: U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, August 2002, NCJ 194530.
Again, I am not talking about domestic violence and I do acknowledge that DV is committed by both men and women.
Let me reiterate so as not to offend anyone. I believe the experiences of men who have experienced false accusations are horrible and unwarranted. Occurrences such as these are detrimental and hurt the credibility of both sexes. I realize that both sides of this argument will be able to find and cite sources so agreement is impossible. I do encourage all of you to perceive sexual assault and rape as serious issues not to be dismissed by allegedly high percentages of false accusation.

I know too well what it is like to be a victim of a devastating false accusation. I was falsely accused of waving a gun at a woman who lives a few houses down the street. The “victim” and her friends came to my home and threatened me with bodily harm and death, all because the woman’s nine year old nephew allegedly told them that I had approached him in the middle of the road way and dropped my pants in front of him. The thought of doing something like this has never even crossed my mind. The boy’s aunt and mother knew it was a lie. If they knew it possibly happened they would have gotten a warrant as they told the police officers they would. They did not get a warrant nor did the state of Tennessee. The police ignored my complaint regarding the woman and the armed mob who came to my house and threatened me. I was arrested without being informed that I was being arrested. I was never even informed of my miranda rights. The aunt ( the “victim”), gave two different accounts of what she claimed happened on the night of Aug2,2006. There was an investigation and no weapon was found. I made it politely clear to the police officer who arrested me that I had no gun and only a limited and controlled access to the rifle that is assigned to me by the Tennessee Army national guard. I have recently sent a letter of request to investigate to the F.B.I. and select persons in the U.S. Department of Justice along with proof the woman lied to the police and the state. The whole case was a “he said/she said case and the state chose to seek a conviction against me and sentence me to two to fifteen years in prison, all based on the woman’s word alone. Because of the woman lying, I lost a good future in the U.S. Army and, almost got thrown out of the national guard here in Tennessee. False accusations do cause irepairable harm and destroy lives. As a result of what happened to me, I have nothing left to live for and nothing left to lose. I feel pain everyday and very disenfranchised.

I virtually lost my life because a woman wanted to play victim and cause me harm. I was the actual victim of a crime yet, the police and the state didn’t care about a male victim.

Me a Soldier and the state didn’t care. The prosecutor they chose to take the case is a known feminazi. You might ask why my lawyer wasn’ doing anything to help me. I had two public defenders and one court appointed attorney (one at a time) who made it clear they were not going to defend me. The public defender’s office dropped my case because of conflict of interest. The court apointed attorney, who I thought might be better, coerced me to accept a plea bargain to a lesser charge. Not a one of these,or the state, had an account given by me concerning what really happened. How can a public defender or a court appointed attorney defend a client without having their client’s side of the story? I sent to the F.B.I. and the Depatment of Justice a copy of the police report and the transcripts from the preliminary hearing that shows how the “victim” couldn’t keep her lie straight. I also sent my account of what really happened. Only one other person should have a brief account,according to me, of what happened. This is one of the things I believe; true justice is never satisfied by the blood,suffering or, death of the innocent.

i’m also loving a falsely accused man..My daughters friend of 3 1/2 yrs was welcomed n2 our family as she was our own;ncluded her n several family outings etc. this young lady had dated boys n her past & on some occassion have been seen n our hallway being fondled but @this time she decide to date a girl which her family strongly opposed, her mother continously questioned whether she was sure of her decision. her girl friend being the stud wasn’t allowed n her mothers house & her brothers stopped talking to her. So, feb2009 i cooked her a birthday dinner, she turned 18 shortly after i gave one of my usual lectures advs her that now she grown by illinois law she cant visit like she use to, however upon each visit that once stated to her directly when i’m going to sleep u most leave & if i’m not home u are not to be here (cant play wife & ward ) * she responded w/understanding 3/17/09 @155p she text my daughter “where r u?” my dauther replied @ultra foods w/my mom & sister. With knowing this nfo she states her younger brother wanted his white hat whch was @my house due to her leaving it there nstead of sending her brother to get frm my husband she went to retrieve it. ( please remember the rule i told her to her face.) Per my husband, he answered the door she walked right in w/o being welcomed; headed straight to my daughters room where she got the hat. The victim? states: my husband requested to perform only oral sex on her. According to my husband she said yes thn gently took him by the hands leading n2 our bedroom where the supposed attack to place. ( both taking advantage of an opportunity ) During the event he states he did not penetrate he performed only 2-3licks.
Once he finished he helped her get dressed gave her..her shoes and let her out all the while not displaying signs of distress or giving any indication that he did any thing wrong. Before closing the door behind her.. per my husband, she said now that i’m 18 we can b more that nieghbors. And did he think she was too pretty to b gay? plus w/all multiple fights & arrest he’s gone thru w/me that he should leave me & be w/her. He said he replied,”no. . . i’m not leaveing my wife for nobody, so she proceeded to leave( quietly ).
My husband went back2 his reg routine whch was beer & playstation3 for about 30ins. Unknown to him that w/n seconds his whole life w/b changing. Her brothers attempted to kick n my door about 255p aftr getting her call; even thou i’m @the store i’m on the phone w/him when the break-in started. Please note* my apartment has a front & back door. So w/that being said he opened the frnt door to prevent any futher damage. ( crow bar )
he’s rushed by six men ( nieghbors )before the police arrived. So, again my husband & i have had our share of problems & disagreements whch sometimes brought the attention of police. As u can see he’s no angle & niether is she. However if he knew that he had violated her he would not have set back down to cont. a video game; he w/have “dipped” out the back door. ( excuse my slang ) For some reason i became very fearful to leave my house; stayed n about 5dys too scared. Once i had calmed i had come to learn that she was outside next day aftr the supposed attack, still w/her hospital band on. I hear people asking her “girl why u still got that on?” she replied w/smile “idk” but because her brothers came to her supposed rescue, now their talking to her again & the girl friend not only was she allowed to come in2 the mothers’ house she could also spend nights!!! ( shocked ). Tried to ask the mother/daughter to drop charges *refused*. Tried to get the mother to see that her little sheep n wolves clothing wasn’t being honest w/her & that theres more to this store.( denial ) Neighbors have come forward say’g she’s been @our apartmnt b4 n the past whn my daughter and i weren’t home. So he’s n jail & tomorrow we go2 court to file motions. So if anyone has ideas to share on how help him. Please Please advise any advise is very welcomed.

Robert, they never do. After tearing my husband’s life to shreds and admitting that his falsely accusing wife was the “most repugnant person on the planet” (the DA’s EXACT words), it was like “Oh well”. His life was torn to shreds but if a woman is raped, all sorts of services are available to her. I am not advocating doing away with these services for REAL victims of rape but, rather, wonder WHO IS GOING TO HELP THE MALE VICTIMS of these heinous lies?

Shannon would have us believe that it’s far far worse for a woman to be raped. I say apples and oranges, first of all, and a rape victim’s life is only destroyed if she allows it to be. I speak as a relative of women who HAVE been raped. When your name is destroyed and everyone is sure you’re guilty, then what?

Shannon, I do not believe for one minute that only two percent of rape claims are fake. You believe what you what – even when you attempted to be understanding, you really angered me. YOU live his life and then take that patronizing attitude.

My brother is experiencing this right now, and he has been torn away from his three sons due to false allegations of DV. I can’t believe this is happening. I believe laws should be in place to protect victims of any kind of abuse, but the laws should be written to protect the victims only – not people taking legal action out of pure spite and revenge. Here’s a petition to congress. If anyone has experienced this, or knows someone who has, please sign!

http://www.petition2congress.com/2/1627/go/350122/

Shannon said “ It’s even more important to note that only 10-15% of all sexual assaults are ever reported. The problem of violence towards women is only related to men in the way that men perpetuate the violence. Rape is a woman’s issue, 1 in 4 women will be raped or sexually assualted in her lifetime.”
This a feminist myth fed along with the poison that runs throughout the fabric of our society that thread is feminism .

If a law routinely fails to differentiate between the ‘rapist’ and the ‘non-rapist’, the ‘abuser’ and the ‘non-abuser’, the ‘pedophile’ and the ‘non-pedophile’, that law fails to ACCURATELY IDENTIFY the ‘rapist, abuser, or pedophile’…This is a law which fails to protect the real victim of rape or physical/sexual abuse. Even as an advocate for the rights of true victims you have to see the importance of a system that ACCURATELY identifys those that are a danger to the people of our society. Moreover, in our society we take a tough, ‘no-nonsense’ approach to criminal justice(ie. punishment–and dont be fooled by the fancy ‘rehabilitation’ moniker they put on it), therefore our forefathers once again implemented checks and balances to assure that we did not falsely imprison for very VERY long periods of time people who we were not absolutely sure were guilty. This is why the burden of proof(you know that ‘cliche’, guilty beyond a reasonable doubt)exists on the prosecution, to avoid at all cost falsely thowing somebody into our penial system! at all cost!…i got a thought for you, shannon, how many men do you think are raped in prison? yeah…or, how bout this, what small precentage of men in prison do you think acctually report it? How many men in prison are the VICTIM of violence? wow! You see the reality of it is even if shannon is correct in her figure, which i certainly have to question…2% is way too many innocent people to be in prison! As a society we should be appaled at one single innocent human-being being sucked into our so called justice system. Trust me when i say to put an innocent person in prison is to create a criminal out of thin air! Criminal mentality is neccessary to survive in prison. Therefore, it is not only appaling, but hazardous to our society. Think of it in figures…it kinda voids out the incarceration of someone who truely is a danger to our society. Throw an otherwise law abiding citizen into a tank with sharks for a couple years, then release him into society a trained criminal..one off the streets, one on the streets! So you can see how dangerous it can be to lock up the innocent? Its a horrible system full of suffering, discomfort, desolution, lonliness, and devoid of any element of rehab. We must protect our citizens from bad things like murder, and robery, and rape( and terrorism) but not through fanaticism or panic. This only causes more problems. Lastly, i wanna eduate you all to a new, and ever growing/new trend in false accusations…this is the cancer that has infected my life! A growing number of men are being accused, charged, and are usually convinced by some slick lawyer after 2 years of motions and continuences and haveing spent up $25,000 to cop to a plea bargin for possessing child pornography! This is heineous, and you all should know that there are many men who are serving 2, 5, 10 even 20 to 25 years sentences in prison for having illegal pictures on their computer which they did not personally or knowingly and willingly posses…No regard for whether they downloaded them or they were obtained as temp internet files…regardless of whether they were aware of the pictures existance on their computer or not…regardless of whether the computer was a shared computer in a common area of a house many people live or stay at…regardless of intention….regardless of willingness to take a lie detector, or cooperate with any investigation to so as to clear their name…etc, etc, etc…this is a modern day witch trial/mccarthy era! And it is not only destroying the lives of those accused, but it is also FAILING to protect the children who are acctually being exploited by the real pedophiles who are profiting off of this billion dollar industry(thats right $1billion a year in illegal pornography, and i am broke, unemployed, and am about to file for bankruptcy–who are they arresting? waiters, bus drivers, lawyers, judges, teachers, doctors, social workers, construction workers, regular people)! Something has got to be done! The problem is that no politician stands to gain a single freakin vote by fighting for the rights of falsely accused child pornogrphers! Moreover, due to the inconsistancies in sentencing(they have sentenced men to 2 to 160 years for possession of child pornography)most falsely accused men plea guilty eventually so when they finally do get out of prison with a felony on their record, and registered as a sex offender no one is much willing to listen to what they have to say anyway…and i dont imagine they have much fight left in them after the constant fight for survival required to make it in prison as a convicted “chester”! Me..Iam speaking out NOW! I have been accused of this, and i am not guilty! 2 and 1/2 years of my life now have been spent in and out of court proceedings, grand juries, preliminaries, motion hearing, etc…I live in a relatively small town, so this made the news…i have not been able to get a job since(thats 2 1/2 years of unemployment)..my girlfriend, who consequently knows/swears by my innocence and has been with me through the entire ordeal held it down as long as she could financially but we are now getting evicted and have had every utility shut off except electric…our lives are falling apart! I dont sleep because when i do i dream about being in prison….i have had deal after deal thrown at me ranging from 8years to 3 years…I refuse to take a deal! I am innocent, and i will let 12 of my peers decide wether they believe me or not! My lawyer warns me against it because i literally face 75 years, but i believe this is bigger then me! This is about truth, so my fate will lie in the hands of people just like you! I hope they understand whats at cost! For what its worth, they, along with God have my faith…as for you, please educate yourselves on what the police and prosecution are doing in your name…in the names of our children…THIS IS NOT A SOB STORY…MANY HAVE FACED FALSE IMPRISONMENT AND HAVE PREVAILED….MANY HAVE FACED WORSE….I TOO WILL PREVAIL! THIS IS, HOWEVER, A TRUE STORY! THERE IS PROBABLY ONE IN EVERY TOWN LIKE THIS RIGHT NOW! IF WE DO NOTHING, THERE WILL BE ONE IN EVERY FAMILY LIKE THIS! EVENTUALLY, THERE WILL BE A STORY IN EVERY HOUSEHOLD LIKE THIS! AND PS…I SAY ‘MEN’ OVER AND OVER AGAIN BECAUSE UP TILL RECENTLY IT HAD ONLY BEEN MEN CHARGED WITH THIS CRIME, BUT I JUST RECENTLY HEARD OF A FEMALE BEING CHARGED FOR THE SAME THING, SO IT IS NOT JUST A ‘MAN’S’ PROBLEM ANYMORE!

May I respectfully ask if all of you are members of NCFM? $30 – I know it’s a lot of money but there’s no way we can ever hope to inform the public of these things unless we unite. I’m sure even $5 would be welcome.

This is such a tragity, I am going through this with my husband as well. He is accused of raping his 2 children. Violently raping them. I know it’s not true, so I stand by his side. He is in jail right now and it has ruined our lives. Not just his life, his children’s and mine. I don’t know what more I can do but to keep doing what i’m already doing and that is research, and I read and reread all documents that I have recieved from my husband. There is so much just in those documents that he is innocent. But to prove it is the difficult part. All they need in my state is an accuser. So, that means anybody can say anything about anyone, and put them away. It’s really sad. All the medical says he is innocent as well. It has been 9 months already and trial isn’t gonna start for another 5-7 months. I am having a hard time dealing with all of this. I don’t know what else to do or who else I can turn to, His lawyer seems to not be doing much to help him. It is so true that you are guilty until proven innocent.It’s a long tedious uphill batter, that seems to never end, I describe it as a nightmare and I can’t wake up from it. Thanks for reading.

Is their a way of donating by money order? After having a bad experience with credit cars,I cancelled both of mine. I really would like to be a member.

Contessa, Thank you for being so compassionate. It is rare that I hear such compassion from a women, as many of the women in my city are mean. Also Shannon should visit this site to find out how common or rare false rape accusations are.

http://falserapesociety.blogspot.com/

This Web site was started by a U.S.-based attorney to help raise awareness about Western Civilization’s taboo epidemic, wrongful rape claims. In recent years, our society has declared war on rape, and numerous measures have been adopted to make reporting rape easier than ever. It also has become easier to make false rape claims. In the process, we have allowed an entire class of victim — those falsely accused of the vile crime of rape — to be treated as nothing more than flotsam, collateral damage in what many regard as the more important war on rape, despite the grievous harm falsely accused men and boys often suffer.

another suspect Says:

“Moreover, in our society we take a tough, ‘no-nonsense’ approach to criminal justice(ie. punishment–and dont be fooled by the fancy ‘rehabilitation’ moniker they put on it), therefore our forefathers once again implemented checks and balances to assure that we did not falsely imprison for very VERY long periods of time people who we were not absolutely sure were guilty.”

Could you explain that to any of the people featured here?

http://www.innocenceproject.org/

There are still innocent men who will more than likely die in prison.

Contessa, after what happened to me, I almost became a radical MRA. I kind of understood what it was like to be raped (by someone using/abusing the law to do so. I have become evolved into a constitutional,civil, and human rights advocate.

Another suspect, you are correct, there are a few men who falsely accuse women of rape ( I wonder if radical feminists will claim it is only two percent or a myth, as they claimed false rapes were.

True justice is never served by the blood,suffering or death of the truely innocent.

Heartbroken, have you considered contacting this organization?

The Equal Justice Foundation

I am so glad this blog exists (and the organization which supports it). I am also so glad all of you contribute and keep this discussion alive and timely.
Being male, and having experienced a false accusation, and having experienced the consequences of a false accusation, I have to say that watching the statistics enumerated on both sides just leave me confused. In other words, I want to be sympathetic to what women experience in the world (as far as threats of rape, DV, et cetera), and at the same time I find the interest groups (in other words, groups influenced or backed by feminist work) to have no interest in any empathy or sympathy for my situation. That is to say, Shannon enumerates her statistics, and in my earlier days, I would have carte blanche been sympathetic and understanding – but, now, after experiencing all the repercussions that come with false accusations, I have nothing but disgust for the feminists (or those who support them like Shannon) for anything they say, because it does not seem like individuals like Shannon want to do anything about false accusations (why would they, they are attacked vehemently for taking a counter position?) and so I am left in a political deadlock: namely, disgust for the feminists, disgust for women who falsely accuse, and yet wanting to have some kind of balance here. Of course I am foolish to think such a balance can exists in today’s climate, and berate myself for ever trusting women to be honest (at least the kind of woman i have been falsely accused by). All this to say, I am glad you are writing this, but at the same time I feel the only real conclusion from everything you write is for men to be aware from a very young age (high school, junior high even) not to trust women (because you never know which woman might just be that false accuser)…that I have to use the same tactics the feminists used to attack the feminists: for instance, “every woman is a potential false accuser.” So that the next generation of men growing up now may walk the streets and work in their jobs and socialize at parties protecting each other, reminding each other that “every woman is a potential false accuser.” Vilifying women, in other words. How else are men to fight women like Shannon? Women like Shannon aren’t going to defend falsely accused men. It takes the same sort of radicalism that the feminists employed to fight the feminists. But, in saying this, I am encouraging the destruction of the social cohesion of the family. I am saying that husbands and boyfriends should distrust their girlfriends and wives with all their heart – never really love them – but always sort of suspect them, be ready for that potential false accusation. For some reason, I think nature (human nature that is) always takes revenge on such radical thinking: I’ll lose in the long run just as much as the feminists will (the feminists will eventually lose, with people like Glenn Sacks around, they will lose eventually). So, what I am really left concluding ( and I apologize for my rambling entry ) is that the U.S. is really a sick and evil country, inside and out. There’s a reason countries abroad hate us, and there’s a reason our own populace hates this country (I hate this country for falsely accusing me, for allowing a female to falsely accuse me – why would any sane man be patriotic when the justice system of his country allows a woman to falsely accuse him?). In other words, what the feminists like Shannon really represent is the implosion of the United States upon itself, eating itself alive with pernicious radicalism. Countries like China and India will become more powerful and more socially cohesive, and the only people we will have to blame – is ourselves.

I apologize for adding an addition. But I do think the charge of “overblown” may easily be flung at me, understandably. That aside, my conclusion simply wanted to suggest that when you live in a country with such polarized politics (feminists who claim 2%, researches who claim 60%, regarding false accusations), the only result of this radicalism, especially when it comes to something so intimate as sexual relations and the family, is the disintegration of the family and sexual relations. China and India have infrastructure issues that they are fixing and restoring as we bicker and argue about false accusation statistics. China and India – despite all their injustices against their own people – have a heavy hand socially and do not let these issues disrupt their country’s growth. I’m not saying they are right or innocent or democratic countries (despite appearances with regards to India): what I am saying is that they are not destroying the family unit as we destroy that unit. Our radicalism has caused men and women to distrust one another: to actually worry about writing “he” or “he and she” or “S/he” when writing a term paper or newspaper article. We actually worry about such things! And it is this kind of radicalism, creating pettiness, which usually brings a country low. I hope perhaps – even though I know I will be reamed regarding China’s human rights record – the others on this site see the point. The feminists beat the hell out of american men in their writings and get away with it, are accepted for it, legalized for it: there is something cryptic about that, sly, and slick, that eventually brings a society down. China’s human rights record: the Chinese know exactly what they are doing: abusing human rights in China isn’t an accepted social movement like feminism in the u.s. – this is what will eventually bring the u.s. down as we destroy our social fabric, openly, consciously, and funnily enough – legally.

Good points American echo. Being a member of the U.S. Military and a victim of false accusations, I understand everything you are saying. Being the victim of false accusations, and a system that is programmed to attack men, based on hysteria and ,in many cases, feminist jurisprudence, has caused my patriotism to begin eroding. I try to never throw up to anyone my job of upholding and defending the U.S. Constitution; one of our most valuable documents and, the supreme law of the land. Imagine how I feel when someone. whose rights I defend, misuses their rights to not only cause irreparable harm but, a crime of falsely accusing me of a serious crime. The state of Tennessee simply took her word as if it were gospel, even though she perjured her statement to the police. There is also the fact that I was never allowed to give my account of what really happened. God is my witness. I did not have a gun or any other type of firearm nor, did I even pretend to have one. Simply on her word, and her word alone, the state saught a class c felony conviction against me. How can I feel patriotic when I am not considered to have any rights or any value in this country? The government I defend betrayed me.

Contessa, is there a way of sending in membership dues to join this National Coalition?

By snail mail ( money order).

Yes – I think snail mail is the only way to join.

Heartbroken, feel free to email me here:

eightdozenroses@yahoo.com

I only check it once a week but I do know what it’s like to need someone to just listen. I’ve never found such a person in RL because no one wants to hear about false accusations – until it’s their turn.

What is the mailing address?

I found it.

National Coalition for Men (NCFM)
932 C Street, Suite B, San Diego, CA 92101

True justice is never served by the blood,suffering and, death of the innocent.

Contessa, I hope you and your husband are both doing ok.

I have been falsely accused in 1995 and still I’m being persecuted for something that never happened.It’s a horrible way to have to live.

My story is a strange one. I am a good Dad who married an unstable woman who basically lives like a gypsy going from guy to guy like a bee goes from flower to flower. I tried to give my daughter a stable life and teach her right from wrong, but thanks to my ex’s devil-may-care attitude, my daughter was molested when she was just a baby by my ex’s new husband. I got sole custody of her after that. But, who knows what damage it did to her head, so I gave her a lot of slack because of it. She was a decent kid up until she started to come into her teen years. Then, she became a monster. My health went downhill and I had a stroke that took most of the vision in one of my eyes and disabled me for life due to other side effects of the stroke afterward. I tried and tried to get my daughter to behave. We moved in with my parents because I lost the house due to rising medical bills, and she fell in with a bad crowd at school. Disciplinary reports mounted and mounted. I had to ground my daughter several times and take things away from her at times. She didn’t like that one bit and decided she was going to start spinning a story about me molesting her around town and at school. The Police and other authorities were constantly telling me to put her on “CHINS” which means Child In Need Of Services. What it REALLY means is you are giving your child over to the state and they have every right to do what they want with him/her. I refused initially. My daughter got so bad that the her accusations were investigated by Child Services and the Police. It was found out that she was constantly changing her story and they found the accusations unfounded. I sent her to live with relatives (my ex’s) and she became a nightmare for them as well. So, like an idiot, I took her back into the home. She promised to stop the accusations and admitted to my mother that nothing ever happened. Well, soon she was up to her old tricks again and the trouble escalated. She pulled a knife on me, knocked my elderly mother to the ground once, and disturbed my elderly father so much that he nearly had a heart attack and had to be hospitalized. So, I figured the “CHINS” program was my only out. I put her on it and she decided it was time for real revenge on me. She started her story about being molested again and this time wanted to make it stick. She, and a friend, got a hold of my computer and planted Child Porn on it. They planted it in several places on the drive and left discs that were labeled like I label my own archive discs (full of games and movies). The police and the child services people stormed our home, took my PC, took my daughter, and dragged me off to jail after tackling me, bending my arm back up to my neck and telling me to stop resisting! I spent a week in Jail till my parents sold my old car and gathered up some other savings to bail me out. The system has been totally against me since. I was arraigned WITHOUT a lawyer present, never read my rights, and found guilty by a circuit court and not the superior court. So, my daughter is still in their custody and contentedly going from foster home to foster home because she can’t behave. She contacted my mother a couple times and said she was having a great time. They have her on all sorts of meds. And here I sit with a child pornography possession hanging over my head. The system considers me guilty until proven innocent because I own the PC where the images were found. The investigating officer is even trying to get me convicted of distributing the child porn because I had many pirated games and movies. He feels I was trafficking based on that alone. This has been a nightmare for my family and I. None of us sleep well, if at all. This has been going on for a year. My public defender is useless because he knows little about computers and our so-called expert thinks I am guilty because they left the discs behind. Lots of people don’t think teenage girls are capable of this level of framing someone, but I am living proof that they are. I will most likely be accepting a plea deal because they are offering me 1 year at county versus the 7 years at state. I am poor. I have no choice. If I fight, I’ll most likely lose because the law is skewed against ANYONE who is accused of such a heinous crime. Like someone said before: WHERE is the justice?? I’ve entertained the thought of suicide several times but haven’t gotten to that level yet. I will have to register for LIFE once I get out. All for a teenager’s revenge and my attempt to be a decent dad who protects her daughter from being a plaything for teen boys. That’s my reward.

Sheesh, sorry to ramble on like that. You can see how frazzled I am about this. Being falsely accused ruins peoples’ lives. I read all the stories above and I can relate to all of them (except Shannon’s biased posts). I nearly went insane being in a cell for a week (I have BiPolar, ADHD, PTSD, and now added a full Panic Disorder after this all started.) I don’t know what will happen to my mind sitting in a 6×8 cell for 23 hours a day for a year. I wish I could afford a real lawyer. But, I am going against the STATE. They have endless pockets for this kind of criminal trial. And endless votes for legislating against those falsely accused.

Jaded Man:

I would strongly caution you to think hard about whether to accept that plea bargain; it’s essentially an admission of guilt — guilt for committing a sex crime against children. Once you do accept a plea bargain, you’ll be put on your state’s list of registered sex offenders, and you may never again be able to obtain stable and gainful employment. If your plea includes jail time, know that prisoners who were convicted of sex crimes against children are often attacked by fellow prisoners. And even once you’ve been released from jail, there’s also your ongoing reputation to worry about.

Despite all that you have written about the heavy-handedness of the law, your right to a jury trial is still inviolable. Utilize it. Expect your public defender to strong-arm you into accepting a plea-bargain, but that’s what they do because they’re so underfunded, and they don’t like defending the not-guilty in an expensive jury trial. Just remember: no matter what your public defender tells you, you are NOT required to accept a plea bargain. If you do decide to utilize your right to a trial, then too bad for the public defender; he’ll have to do his job. It’s your life on the line; don’t be pushed around.

A year ago my husband and i took his daughter from his mom whom had been raising her since she was very small. Reason was his daughter had been causing grandma to much stress, and when she was arrested for vandalizing a school my husband said no more. and she came to live with us. he always wanted her with us he just didnt want her to feel forced until this. not only did she get arrested she wasnt attending any school for almost 2 years and she was only 13. well since then shes been having a issue with not being spoiled rotten since my husband and i have a total of five kids . she didnt want to have to do chores because she had always had everything done by grandma. So her first move was to run to the school councelor claim a bunch of things that werent true about us and cps opened an investigation that lasted about maybe a week or two and the case worker closed it when she decided it wasnt at all true. so then she decided she wanted to run her own life come and go with whomever, when ever she chose…. Not in our home. I guess since the cps thing didnt work she then decided shed run away with a boyfriend we found her almost imediately and shes done it 2 more times since and each time finding a better spot to hide. the second time she was caught she was heard by my sister in law telling cops all sorts of crazy lies about her dad and i trying to get us in trouble. but cops didnt believe her. well now after many promises to not do that again we trusted to let her not be watched constantly. She ran again but this time i had a horrible time finding her location and the cops and i finally did. at this point my husband and i were terrified she was dead or something and when they found her she went full on about her crazy alligations again only this time she stewed up the bigest lie ever. she told police there was drugs and sexual abuse from her father and once again shes got cps in our lifes and with this its almost impossible to prove that shes lying and not to mention the police are investigating to bring charges. I dont know how she could say such a thing and about her blood father but im unable to see her and speak to her right now and cps dont know what to believe. they spoke with every kid in our house and even grandparents and a friend of hers who say this is crazy and a lie. But today it was asked that we sign a temp release till the investigations over , and so shes in foster care, and my whole life is crumbling and i dont know what to do to stop it from ruining my husbands life and hes not ok with being looked at like a creep who messes with kids, thats gross but how do we turn this around to be the truth and make them see shes just a angry kid. i dont want them in my life and no one will tell me if she even is aware how serious this can be for her father and i know we have to have a way to do this or rights that they are walking on ive got five kids so the money is tight barely make the rent and bills everymonth so i cant hire a lawyer. can anyone help me find the answers or resources i can use to stop this disaster we are good people and good parents

I am going in to fight a restraining order from a girl who lived with me. When she left, she stole 800 dollars cash, tools that I had in my car, etc… Before I was even in town she had a stalker order started. When I reported the thief, I was told by law enforcement, “Good luck with that,” and pretty much laughed at. Two days later, there was a restraining order.

They did not laugh when I said I wanted at least 8 subpoenas. If anyone is interested in what happens, the case number is 190918011. It will be heard on September 8, 2009 at 9:02am in Eugene, Oregon, at the Lane County Court in the Show Cause room.

I’ve always been uneasy about feminism, but the past few years, I’ve become aware of specific damage it has done our culture. I was particularly appalled at the false accusations of rape and sexual harassment, and the mindless lumping of all men in the “evil” category. It inspired me to write a novel about a man falsely accused of sexual harassment, and the grief he and his family experience as a result. I invite you to visit my website to learn more, and to email me with comments.

Feminism is not the root cause of the problems faced by those like myself, who have been subjected to unjust, unfair, unconstitutional criminal penalties due to the vindictive lies told by spiteful former relations and the highly flawed, reactionary laws such as the well marketed and over reaching VAWA. I would say that feminism is the struggle for equality between the sexes in the face of a highly unfair history of gender inequality.

What I would refer to the forces and supporters of gender bias legislation of this variety as, would have to be female superiorism. Combating sexism with more sexism and perversions of justice and combating a social ill with rash, emotionally gratifying breaches of due process. I say this because an intelligent feminist will recognize injustice for what it is, while supporters of a system of punishment enacted upon simple accusation, without any burden of proof required (female superiorists) care only for the past injustices done to women. They feel that these injustices and the social ills that are domestic abuse, warrant the punishment of all men and the “empowerment” of women, not to a level equal with their male counterparts, but above them.

Under the Violence Against Women’s Act, criminal convictions can be found and criminal penalties applied, without a criminal burden of proof being met. Simple accusation and often emotional appeals, can be enough to have a man’s Constitutionally protected rights to free speech, the right to bear arms, the right to a due process the right to see his own children made the subject of one’s mood and spite.

When debate is raised, it is quickly squashed by accusations that abuse of the system are either marginal or non-existent and that those who disagree are either ignorant of abuse, condoning of the practice or abusers themselves.

I myself have been a victim of these biased and unjust laws. The victim of a mentally deranged, sociopath, hell bent on ruining my life out of spite due to the failure of our relationship. Our daughter had just been born and we were struggling to make ends meet. While I was bending over backwards to make the money we needed to get by, she was demanding plastic surgery to restore the body she had once modeled with to its former state. While I wrangled the impossible and endless paper work and meetings to obtain social assistance, she watched Seinfeld and insisted upon running off any old friends or family I had when it came to seeing the baby. As time went on, I noticed a pattern emerging, beyond these superficial selfish concerns, as she would continually talk about how the baby “hated her” and how she was thinking of killing herself.

I spent weeks getting her into treatment, scared that she may hurt herself or someone else. After three weeks of treatment, her mental state continued to deteriorate. A social worker asked if I was willing to help commit her to a hospital, but at the time, I still thought I could help her. Two weeks later, I returned home from work to find her and the baby gone. I called the social workers, the mental health facility and even her family, but no one knew where she was. Then, just before I was readying to call police, she called.

She said she had moved out and that she couldn’t live with me any longer. When I asked where she was, she said she couldn’t say and that I couldn’t see our newborn daughter. I told her that if she wanted to leave me it was fine, but that I wouldn’t permit her to keep Quinn (our daughter) from me. She agreed to a preliminary visitation schedule and the next weekend we met in the Walmart parkinglot. She said I would need to bring Quinn back by six and when I asked why, she refused to answer. I asked if she needed money and she said yes, asking for fifty dollars. I gave her a hundred.

I spent the day with my daughter and unsure of what I should do, I reluctantly returned her to her mother at the same Walmart. We agreed upon another visitation the following weekend at the same time. The next weekend, as I woke up and got ready to leave, a call came. It was an hour early but my ex had called to ask with a venomous tone “are you coming to pick up your daughter?”

“Yes,” I said, “I’ll be right there.” On my way, I was diverted due to road construction onto a detour through a residential neighborhood where two blocks up, I saw her. She was in her car with the baby in the back stopped at a stop sign. I drove up and we pulled over onto a side street together.

Approaching her car I noticed she hadn’t rolled her window down or gotten out, but instead sat staring angrily at the wheel. I knocked on the glass and after a moment she rolled it down.

“She can’t see you today, she has a play date with Trevor.” She spat.

“Tabi, she’s twelve weeks old. Trevor’s five. Besides, its my time with her.”

“I need more money Nick. I need at least two hundred. I need gas, she needs food,” (even though Tabi had taken the month’s worth of baby food granted to us by social services) “You can’t see her till I get the money.”

I at the time was broke due to a bi-weekly pay cycle. “I don’t have any Tabi. I’ll get you some when I get paid.”

At that, she started up her car, looked at me and said “no.” As she drove off, I said aloud, “Stop acting like a bitch and let me see my little girl!”

She stopped, backed up and looked at me with a smirk. “Oh I’m a bitch, huh?”

“You are acting like one.” I replied. Once again she drove off. I got in my car and immediately called our social worker, who had become increasingly distant as our problems developed. As I drove and explained the situation, I saw her up ahead. Tabi was pulled over, talking to the cop on traffic duty at the detour beginning. He waved me over and I hung up with the social worker.

He approached my car and leaning over asked if I had just threatened Tabi and my daughter with a gun. I told him I didn’t have a gun, that he could search me if he liked and that Tabi was mentally deranged. Shaking his head he said “you two need to settle this in court. It’ll only get worse otherwise.” He was so right…

A little under a week later, two sheriffs arrived at my door to serve me with a temporary restraining order. They demanded to search my apartment, the confiscated my pistol, a decorative sword and a pocket knife. I was given a court date and at court, during the 15 minute hearing, in which Tabi faked crying and told a wild tale of me screaming at her and sticking a gun in the baby’s face for ten minutes, with the judge asking simply if I had been arrested for it and if I had “anything to say,” half way through which he interrupted me saying he would “take it under advisement.”

A week later I was served with the final order. My apartment was searched again and I was given my court orders, restricting me from seeing my daughter more than 10 hours a week, sometimes going two weeks without seeing her at all, forcing me to pay $100 a week, even though I only pulled in $270 and subjecting me, as I would find, to Tabi’s whims and mood.

I, not having the money to fight it, went along with the absurd schedule, hoping in time things would get better. During this time, Tabi had moved to New Haven (three hours away) with a new boyfriend. After about two months, she came to me during the exchange at the police station, asking if I would sign over my rights as a father and let them move to Florida with the new boyfriend. I said I would not give my little girl up for anything and that was the end of it.

Two weeks later, while dropping my little lady off with her mother, Tabi arrived and took the baby, saying to her “ok baby, say goodbye to Nick, we’re going to see daddy.”

Muttering as I walked out to avoid saying something rash, I said “never going to happen.” Later that night, as I was home at my apartment, five officers arrived and called me down to the landing. They asked if I had seen my ex that day. I said I had. They asked if I called her a skank whore. I said I hadn’t. They then, with a sigh of resignation, told me I was under arrest for violation of the DVP.

I spent two days in jail because Tabi was pissed and decided to lie again. Months and a thousand dollars of borrowed money later, when the trial came around, Tabi didn’t even show up to testify. The charge was dropped, but a week later I received a letter from the clerk dated the day of the trial, in which Tabi had filed a new claim saying I abused and neglected my daughter. I went to the hearing and read a prepared statement I wrote, outlining how Tabi had gamed the system and caused me to miss the majority of my young child’s life and development.

He dismissed the case with no finding. Upon this, I decided it was time to take action and running right up to the clerk’s office I filed paperwork bringing a complaint of contempt and request for modification against her. The case was heard and while my modification request was honored and I was granted more time with my little one, the contempt items were dismissed without even being heard. Now, a year later, I receive word that the vindictive sociopath is requesting an extension of her order, demanding I remain under her yoke.

I never threatened her ever and never could she produce a shred of evidence nor keep a story straight. Repeated false accusations flying left and right, with my defense falling on deaf ears every time. I’ve since learned that under VAWA, the burdens of proof for these criminal complaints need only live up to a civil claim and that courts are incentivized to find in the plaintiffs favor regardless of facts or circumstances.

Its disgusting and for anyone who supports this draconian sexism, for shame…

I’ll also say, that prior to this occurring, I worked in both private security as well as political, non-profit issue advocacy campaigning, both of which have been difficult if not impossible to obtain work in since…

September 21, 2009 is the day I witnessed a travesty. In Citrus County Florida a 20 year old man was snatched from the life he knew and thrown into a state prison to serve a 7 year sentence for crimes he DID NOT commit. From the beginning, he pled NOT GUILTY when out of the blue, his attorney advised him to change his plea to no contest. This was with a 7 year cap..the judge could not give him any more than 7 years. He waited in jail for 7 months only to stand before a judge who believed every lie that was told . There is no justice in the country!! There is no innocent until proven guilty!!!! Not for the poor, not for the young. Justice is only served to those who have money and prestige. This country is allowing dirty cops, greedy district attorneys, and biased judges to destroy the decent men we have left.
This county has gone as far as to sentence a 16 year-old boy with Downs Syndrome to 10 years in a state prison because he stole a 6-pack of beer. That is totally barbaric!!!! This is the “Good Ole Boy” network.
I witnessed the poorest excuse for justice that could be imagined. A 20 year-old boy, with no prior record, except for an incident when he was 15, was sentenced to the maximum allowed, according to his plea deal. His attorney lied to me and my son after I gave him all the money I had to defend my son and he sold him out. Every lie that was told in that courtroom was held against my son but yet, there was no investigation, only the word of 3 people who were the accusers. Believe me, I heard some extreme lies that day and watched the dramatics performed as well. These people should be in Hollywood. There are so many details to this case and wrongs done to my son, I don’t have the room to type them.
I fear for my son’s safety in the Florida Prison System. He is not a violent man but will be treated as a violent offender.
If you ask me why God allowed this to happen I could not tell you. I have asked that question a thousand times myself. No answers!!!
All I know is this system that is supposed to protect the innocent is sending innocent people to prison and allowing their “chosen few” to walk the streets and destroy other young innocent lives. My son will never be the same. He will be changed forever because a judge decided that my sons life wasn’t as important as the liars in the courtroom. Liars and thieves rule the world so why not a little courtroom in Florida?
I raised my son to believe that you only have to pay for the bad things you do. As of September 21, 2009 I retracted that statement. I’m the reason he believed in a system that threw him away. Now I have to stand back and watch that same system try to destroy him. There will be an end to all the dirty cops, greedy DA’s and biased judges but until then innocent people continue to be prosecuted and imprisoned for crimes they did not commit. One day God will pass judgment on all who have not followed His word but what about now? How many lives have to be destroyed before people start saying ENOUGH??? Do we just sit back and allow these people to destroy our kids? I won’t!! I will talk until someone listens that can help change things.

It is an emotional thing to read this blog. I am a man falsely accused of molesting my children. I have been financially destroyed by my ex and I am fighting desparately to see my children again. IT is a lonely journey and I feel for any man going through this situation.

As this is occuring in Illinois, I especially feel for anyone in that state. The state definately leans to the mother. My ex can spout off anything she wants and everyone believes her. The fact is she is mentally ill, with a disease that is difficult to diagnose. Even still, they choose to ignore her past, which includes multiple marriages and herself and mother being sexually abused (if it is not a lie)

I feel as if the only solution will be for her to kill me and get rid of me – this will be a good thing for her, since I have a sizable life insurance policy and she will continue to get the children’s support.

What makes it difficult is that she is the one abusing the children, by filling them full of lies. Where is the justice. I can’t see the kids at all and she gets them every day! Reading this blog clues me in that there are others out there in the same situation – yet nothing is being done.

It is difficult, because we have to prove our innocense and there is no easy way to do that. Once this awful accusation is made it is always out there. Noone knows except you and the kids. When the kids are so small, they will never remember and therefore the truth will never be heard. No one will ever listen. That being said it is even difficult to make the claims that you are innocent because criminal attorneys tell you not to talk. District Attorneys will say it is those that protest too much that get thrown in jail, because eventually something said won’t match exactly and then that will be equated to everything being a lie.

There needs to be better support for this scenario, because it is just not right.

I can go on and on about my ex telling lies – During hte divorce it was I was physically abusing her, then I was gay, then this lie. She has to be the victim and it is so sad because her ability to manipulate others is great.

The other unbelievable thing about this situation is that I saw it coming. My friends and family all knew this was going to happen because I told them. You see, my ex taught my children at an inappropriate age some very sexual things. Proper terms for private parts and so forth – it was weird, but I could do nothing except live with it.

Additionally, my ex did things while we were married to set the stage for her future torture. It was weird and I can only assume frustrating for her, because these “traps” never worked, because they were based on dillusional opionions she was hoping existed.

In summary, I can add that what gets me through is the faith that when my children are old enough to make their own decisions, they will see the truth. Then they can have a healthy (as much as possible) relationship with their father who loves them and has missed them greatly.

I pray all they time that my ex doesn’t scar them too badly and that they can have a happy and productive life. I pray that for all children put into this situation.

Shannon, I have a question for you: if you really believe in equality between women and men, then do you think that women who lie about rape should get the same penalty as men who rape? Or do you think that the women who have lied in cases such as Hofstra and Duke U should serve no jail time?

And if you believe in equality, would you support university programs to raise consciousness about why women lie about rape?

You say: “The definition of feminism, according to Merriam-Webster, is “: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes”, which means that by definition and practice I fight for the equality of both women and men.”

But this is not a definition which most feminists follow. Please note that Shannon’s parade of statistics concentrate on women as victims, but not as perpetrators (of everything from DV to lying about rape). More fundamentally, feminism as it exists in the real world is not about equality. It is about giving women (or I should say, pro-feminist women) certain privileges via affirmative action, government set-asides, womyn’s studies departments, and special protection via VAWA and so forth. At the same time they do not demand that women take up the duties of men, such as registering for the draft.

Feminists, of course, have a long history of being opposed to basic constitutional rights. For example, their support for the Lautenberg Amendment is a violation of the 2nd Amendment. And their Mau Mauing of Larry Summers from the presidency of Harvard shows feminist contempt for Free Speech. And such “oppressive” patriarchal customs as due process and presumption of innocence get tossed out the window to be replaced with hysterical feminist lynch mobs demanding the lynching of innocent men, such as the Duke University Three.

See my website on Why Feminists Lie About Rape.

I’m afraid you may be unaware of a great injustice currently happening in Oregon. Local prosecutor Jody Vaughan is currently pursuing false rape charges against a local man. Her tactics are less than ethical and has built “evidence” she knows to be based on lies.The evidence against the alleged “victim”, proving SHE is a repeat liar and crier of wolf is incredible and hard to overlook; unfortunately that is exactly what the Deschutes County District Attorney’s office is doing.

As a woman, a mother and a victim of rape and sexual assault, it is extremely important to me for a woman to feel safe to report sexual abuse of any kind. I know firsthand the personal power that is regained when looking an offender in the eye and sending them to prison. Regrettably I have also learned that it is far too common for women to hide behind the claim of rape in order to avoid taking personal responsibility for their own actions. The classic he said she said is almost always swayed to the woman’s side, requiring little proof on her end of the alleged events; leaving the accused to fight for their life with little help due to the Rape Shield Law. My concern is that this man is not going to receive a fair trial due to the protections this “victim” has on behalf of the DA’s office. This isn’t the first time she has cried rape falsely and without your help it certainly will not be her last. Please, take the time to follow the link and read the story of Kevin.

(http://usobserver.com/archive/sept-09/driscoll-september.htm )

The time is now for something to be done, before another innocent life is ruined. Kevin’s trial begins November 3rd, 2009. Can some please tell me what to do. I know that he has been trying everything to prove his innocents. Any help or information would be great. Thank you

Angela,

I have posted your link onto Antimisandry.com and asked people to help with an email campaign to the DA and the local publications. Meanwhile, check out the False Rape Society’s website. They have lots of resources there for people who are falsely accused. Also there is an outfit called Accused Falsely that is a network of lawyers that specialize in false accusations. Tell Kevin that it will cost a lot of money but he is young and can recouparate. It seems to be late in the game now so time is not on Kevin’s side.

Angela, I am SHAGDA from antimisandry.com, I read “bobs” post and read your link as well.After reading it I wrote an email to newsdirector@kohd.com expressing need for further investigation, along with that 2 links..If you would like to read the email I sent I have posted it hear..

http://antimisandry.com/false-allegations/guy-needs-help-23962.html#post178176

On October 1st I returned home from work to find out my girlfriend of 5 years and mother to my 3 year old son was having a relationship with another man. To say I was devestated would be an understatement. We began arguing and she wanted me to leave our home and I refused and said “I’ll be damned if someone else is going to sleep in my bed”. An arguement ensued and I took her cell phone to read the text messages she was sending back and forth with this other man. When I returned to our home I was approached by police who asked me what was going on. I explained what had happened and they spoke with her as well and basically said no crime was committed and that they could not enforce anyone leaving but suggested that one of us leaving for a cool down period would be a good idea. The police also stated that while no charges were being filed if they had to come back someone would most likely be going to jail. At that point I called my Mom and asked her if I could come spend the night with her so that the situation didn’t esculate. I had plans of joining the military and had recently taken the asvab test and was waiting on my physical. While at my mothers I made a decision I was not going to go back, while I wanted to be with my son I did not want to be with someone who could not be faithful to me and had been very vindictive in the past. I had visitation rights with my son as I insisted on this at the time of his birth because we were not married and I wanted to protect my rights as a father should a problem ever occur…..my mom is a paralegal and see’s this sort of thing all the time. Because my son was in the residence at the time of this altercation DCF was notified and they came and talked to me about the incident. I told them everything that had happened and at that time I was told of accussations that were being made against me by my x. I was outraged that she had accused me of domestic violence as I have never layed a hand on her or our son in all the years we were together. My family immidiately began to ralley around me and help me fight these accussations and through our own investigative work found out that she had been committing fraud with the state in order to recieve assistance for our son through the many different agencies. My mother contacted the DCF hotline for fraud and abuse and told my x that she had reported her and that she would not use my son as a pawn anymore. The very next day, 1 week after the altercation she went to the court house and filed and injunction for emergency protection and made statements that she had been physically and mentally abused for the past 5 years and was in fear for her life and our sons. Based on that statement alone and with no evidence the judge granted her 100 percent custody and I am only allowed to go to my home one time to pick up clothing and personal hygene stuff. In the 5 years we were together the police have never been called to our home prior to the incident stated above. My son is my pride and joy and has never been abused! The only abuse is her depriving me, a loving father from being with my son. She knows the only way to hurt me is to come between me and my son, whom I adore. I don’t have much money and quite honestly after reading all these post I am truely afraid that I won’t get a fair hearing. If the judge takes the time to listen to the evidence as well as witnesses I might have a chance but it sounds as though this is not how the proceedings will take place. It was my understanding that I had a right to face my accuser and question her in a court of law, however according to everything that I’m reading and the research I have done that is not the case. In Florida the accussation only needs to be plausable, it falls in the realm of “he said, she said” and if the judge thinks there is the slightest possibility that DV occured than I will not only lose my rights to my child but will also be facing criminal charges as well. Where is the justice in any of this? I recently lost a friend who committed suicide because his girlfriend left him with his newborn child and refused to let him see her. At the time I couldn’t understand how someone could take there own life, but now I can feel his pain and I can definately relate. Having your child ripped away from you merely for revenge is about as low as you can go. I am trying to do whatever I can to come up with the money in order to hire an attorney to represent me and protect my son from being taken away from the one person who truely loves him but honestly I am running out of time and resources as my hearing is on the 21st of October. I don’t know what to do or where to turn. Could someone please advise me what to do, I feel the weight of the world upon me and the mere thought of losing my son has already killed me inside.

Andrew I feel your pain…I live in Florida as well. GET A LAWYER QUICK! Find one who has experience in these types of matters. My horror story began in August 2008 with my wife’s ex accusing me of molesting my step-daughter…I was arrested on December 5th. The arrest warrent had $100,003 bond on it ( signed by a female judge) I wasn’t read my rights either…spent the night in jail and had a male judge @ 1st appearance. He lowered the bond to $15,000 (so it was $1500 to bail out). We had to retain my lawyer @ $5,000 pre-trail and if it went to trail it would be another $5,000. We had to pay $650 for a lie detector test by a retired FBI agent and $600 to be examined by a prominent local Psychiatrist both are specialists used by the state. I naturally passed the lie detector and the psycho-sexual examination as I was innocent. My lawyer also found 10-12 descrepancies in the testimonies of my accusers including the DCF investigators. I appeared in court for pre-trail appearances 4 times before a female judge and finally the female prosecutor dropped the charges after my lawyer presented my case to the head prosecutor (a male) who said I never should have been charged in the first place. Naturally, during all of this, the ex-husband went before the family court and futher barred visitation from my wife and our lawyer got that remedied to be visitation as long as I’m not present. And of course the ex violates this order and refuses to allow much contact between my wife and her daughter. We do not have the resources @ this time to persue it and fix it as upon my arrest, I lost my job as a manager and was reduced in rank and pay progressively, lost my health insurance, almost lost my house, may lose my car…and I still consider myself lucky. I have not seen nor spoken to my step-daughter since August 2008. So get a lawyer, I recommend doing a lie-detector test and a psycho-sexual exam prior to being arrested (in an effort to not be arrested) because DCF will most likely stamp you as a verifyed abuser and recommend you be arrested. DCF will manipulate evidence and lie to get you arrested. So GET A LAWYER! (and my story was in a nutshell… the pain is very real and consumming)

Scott, I am sorry to hear everything you have had to endure and all that you have lost because you were falsly accused. I am glad to hear they finally dropped the charges against you. My heart is breaking and I yearn to be with my son each and every moment of everyday. The thought of losing him has destroyed the person I once was and more importantly the person I might have become. Instead I feel alone, confused, angry and sad all at the same time and find myself deperate and drowning in unchartered waters. My horror story is just beginning and I can’t imagine it getting any worse and yet I know it will. I would do anything to protect my child from harm but the court has tied my hands. If I had to sell everything I had in order to prove my innocense so that my child would know how much I love him, I would do that! The court has made it almost impossible for me to defend myself as I am sure my clothes will bring little or no money to help in my defense.

Andrew I hope you will be able to find a lawyer…beg and borrow if you have to because without one it is next to impossible to defend against these false allegations. I wish I could help you but all I can offer is my advice and moral support. Hang in there and I am praying for you and your family that this will work out in a positive manner. If you wish you can email me bluvocal@yahoo.com I would like to keep in touch and help out if I can.

Scott, I do apprecitate all the support I can get right now. Your moral support and prayers mean more to me than you know. Thank you for taking the time to offer me advice as I feel I keep hitting brick walls. I am continueing to use any and all resources I can in order to fight this false alligation. Here is my email as well, meswilkins@cox.net thank you again for all your advice Scott, I do apprecitate it. I look forward to hearing from you or I will let you know how things are progressing as my court hearing is right around the corner.

Much of our brocken societies stem from the incompitences and discrimination perveyed by Family Law Courts, so biased accounts that go unchallenged render many good men and above all fathers being slated by vengeful mothers and fee earners (Solicitors/Barristers) exsasibating matters as they have a finanial insentive to do so …..justice will never come into it here!!

Andrew, I sent you an email!

Daveyone Our “justice” system is most assuredly ‘guilty until proved innocent’ and even then you will be considered a risk for no fault of your own….

Wow! I did not know how rampant false accusations are. My brother is currently fighting a protective order. The order was gotten with false accusations. He has not been able to see or talk to his children in two months. He was very involved with his children. She had the high paying job. He took a job making less so he could be there for the children. Now he has nothing. His children were his life. How in this day and age can a person be guilty with not proof? He told me he could fight it but it would mean his daughter would have to testify against her mother.
I don’t understand why she had to be so ugly. Why not just get a divorce like most people? I just feel the laws are in place for women that really need that help and she is just thumbing her nose at those women. This just is selfish and keeping the children from their father is the abuse.

I have been falsely accused of molesting my daughter. After passing two lie-detector tests and one psychosexual evaluation at a leading center, why on Earth do I still have to defend myself ?
I need advice: I want my ex-wife to go through a lie-detector test, but I don’t know the questions that are relevant as to whether she is training or coaching my daughter. Can anybody help, PLEASE?

I first entered Family Court and previously thouight the F4J protest were foolish and whilst I believe they are counter productive I have sympathy with what drives a guy to such desperate protests just to have contact with their kids and have done nothing wrong! Instead of getting bitter and twisted over this which would have been quite easy,I chose to make a 6 year study of it and some of my conclusions have shown how bad it is in the UK with ineffectual Law ministers in Lord Falconer , Barness Scotland and Jack Staw and it will be interesting to see if the New (Opened this month) Supreme court of appeal with serve those who have been done wrong in County courts!
As bad as it is in the UK I did not realise it was a worldwide phenominom and seem as bad in the US with slight State and County variations it is even worse in Canada and whilst courts are a little more open in Australia they still remain far from ideal!
I intend to blog till this law is reformed and can be found on the UK’s leading newspaper thus
http://www.thesun.co.uk/discussions/forums/show/SunTalk-6401.page

My brother finaly was able to speak to his children after two months of no contact at at all. Because of the accusations he was given supervised visitation for 6 months. He was told her lawyer was looking to make sure he went to jail if they took it to trial. So if myself or my parents want to see the children we have to be “processed” & cleared and must be supervised. My father is so upset. He says what has he done but helped them all these years when they asked. I agree. We are treated like criminals just because she wanted a divorce and all the control.

I have to add that contessa has the guts to stand up for the men. On the other hand, I have been raped by men and women as a toddler. I have to admit that a woman forcefully made me do things that I did not know was morally wrong. As a toddler, I was forced to lick her between the legs, and eat the butt, use my finger to do fingering things, I was forced or I had my butt whipped. I was at the baby sitters house. I was about 3 years old. I still remember the horror. Now to the feminists, You all can go to hell for all I care. You feminist are nothing but Monsters. I am a 36 year old man who believes women are threats to society. But I was also raped by men too. I have been messed up mentally and socially. I cannot describe the pain that I am suffering. Alot of time I feel like vomiting. I do feel for the men who have no rights or being defended for false allegations. I will not and cannot hurt a woman. I do not have the heart to do so. I have been traumatized, I cannot even sleep at night. You will have to understand that Sex is a wonderful thing.

I cannot fathom that 1 in 4 women have been raped. I can say this, very few women get raped. most of them are under the women age. like teens. However, females tend to forget the ordeal and go on with their lives. Men on the other hand have to deal with the scars.

I have been scarred mentally and socially. I am having a hard time keeping a relationship, I do not know what love is. I am having a hard time associating with people.

I do not know what love is. I wasn;t give a chance. I have been ridiculed in life. I have also been told to step on the bumper of a vehicle to hold on tight to be given a ride home. I have been made fun of because of a drooping eyelid. I have been made fun of because of my social class. I have been made fun of because I am hard of hearing.

I had men wanting to be my friends because of one thing. They wanted what I have which I worked hard for. I hate it when people use innocent to get what they want.

As far the school girls are concerned. Karma is a bitch when it comes back. Mark my words, when it comes back, its a rough price to pay. Remember the Fab 5 Texas Cheerleader scandal. They rode high at the time. Now where are they now. They are living on welfare and working at burger joints.

my name is Phill, I have been through hell. I know what its like being grilled by psychologists and law enforcement officers. It is not fun because of some lies. I almost had my life ruin because of it. Now people forget as they get older. Now I am seeing the same who put me through hell are suffering the pain themselves.

Parental alienation or maunchausens syndrome by proxy is the cruelest thing and woman can do to a devoted dad, but is a weapon they can use with impunity. Equality in society stops at the family court room door, men become doormats and nobody cares the judge the lawyer the social worker the mental health professionals have reverse the premis innocent till proven guilty!
I have had the grilling through court yet in 6 years I have not had a word against me as a father but the contact orders where not enforced on the mother, but added to what is now 25 months of no contact, time in a limited childhood that will never come back, I just hope some day they will come back to me but I already have anticipated regret!
I guess this is small potatoes compared to some of the harrowing accounts here and my ex stopped with her acusations of calling me an alchoholic which nobody believe as I was a trucker for major national companies and in fact she has a criminal record for an assult on me not the reverse, but makes no different in our secretive family court rooms. Time may heel who knows I feel for you guys hard stomarch churning pain if only someone in authority would feel it !
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mpif_uGysno
Take your pick from this lot;
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=CAFCASS&search_type=

I would love if someone has some links I can research on children/teens with mood disorders making false allegations. My wonderful 13 year old daughter made allegations of molestation against her stepdad who has been in her life since she was 3 months old. NOBODY believes this to be true…except for human servises and the district attourney. Her bio dad’s family are even highly doubtful in her claims. My husband is a caring, selfless, sweet man. I KNOW from work experience children with mental illness do this, but the only info I am finding online is false allegations from custody and divorce issues. I want to help my daughter, but there are so many “holes” in her story, and I think the help she needs is to help her out of the hole she has dug herself in. She refuses to testify because “she is afraid no one will believe her and she will go to jail for lying. HELLO! I strongly believes my husbands life long character should speak for his innocence. I can’t believe the so called “experts” can believe her soley based on her 20 minute disclosure. They never looked into her mental health background, or researched the family. We had witnesses in the house during the time period my daughter is allegating it to happen. Her statments are riddled with things that are untrue…such as I was asleep when this was going on….NO, I was in and out of the room and up and around! It goes on and on. Anyway, like I said, I am looking for info on children with mental heath issues making false allegations, or having false memories.

Here is a start;
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=children%2Fteens+with+mood+disorders+making+false+allegations.+&search_type=&aq=f

Take your pick here
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Cafcass&search_type=&aq=f

and here,
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Geldof+on+fathers&search_type=&aq=f

and here is a nice little tune to listen to afterwards enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7xTurH6oLk

I dont know if anyone has heard of the female student at HOFSTRA University that accused four men of raping her, but its really aggravating to me. She went out to a club or some event, met some guys and had consentual sex with all of them while one other guy videotaped it with his cell phone. Afterwards she goes home to her noyfriend and he started questioning her as to what she was doind and where she was. In order to keep him from finding out about it she lies and says she was raped by 4 guys in a bathroom stall. They go down to campus security and file a complaint. The police arrested all four guys and their faces were plastered all over the news. Then when the prosecuter was interviewing her they brought up the fact that there might be a videotape and all of a sudden her story collapsed. She ends up confessing that it was consentual and the boys are let free. Now what drives me crazy about this is that these boys were about to face up to 27 years in prison, their names and faces were all over the news, reputations destroyed, and the police did not want to release even the name of the girl involved. She just ruined their lives and they wouldnt give up her name? Then she doesnt even go to jail for it. She should have to face the same prison term they would have if they were convicted.Its such a double standard. All a woman has to do is say something happened and she is automatically beleived to be telling the truth. Why hasnt some mens organization caused an uproar over this? The national organization of women has caused an uproar over David Letterman and his sex scandal and he didnt even break any laws. All he did was damage his marriage, he didnt do anything illegal. The double standard here is ridiculous and if the womens organization is going to flip out over something like David Letterman then the mens organizations should be fighting back. If it happened to these four boys it could happen to any man and there may not be a video to prove their innocence the next time.

Andrew, I haven’t heard from you here or via email…i am praying you are ok and not being held in jail. I hope to hear from you soon! If you email, me put False Accusations in the subject line so I know it is you.

I don’t know if this is the right place, but in reading your posts, it seems that I may have finally found a group of people who understand my torment. My husband (we are newlyweds of 5 months) was doing great in his life, a student about to pass his classes and enter in to a new career, attending church weekly, attending AA due to a DUI he received just prior to giving up alcohol a year ago. It seems his life was just getting on track. Yes, he did something dumb when he was about 21 years old, he got drunk and stole some beer from a small store. He admitted his guilt, served his time and was on parole.

About a month before he stopped drinking, he stopped in a bar one night to play pool and have a couple beers, he had visited this bar before (maybe twice) and a woman approached him as soon as he walked through the door, she had obviously had a few, she said she had seen him there before, so he invited her to have a drink and play a game of pool. After a couple games of pool and a couple drinks, she took a few shots of tequila and began to kiss him. He admits to kissing her for a minute or two but then stopped and told her he didn’t want to do this. She said “whatever” and seemed to be upset when she left. What happened to this woman next (by the way, he didn’t even get her name)is unclear to us, as my now husband’s sister showed up at the bar to drive him home and he left. Now a year later, a lifetime later, my now husband is arrested and they say this woman was raped that night and his DNA was found on her neck (saliva), no other DNA on her matched him, but since he was the only match that came up in the computer (because of his parole status, they had his DNA on file). They issued a warrant for his arrest. Arrested him out of the blue all because he kissed a woman (consensually) in a bar one night!!!! My husband is the most gentle man I have ever met, he was raised by 5 sisters who taught him against abusing women, and he would never do such a thing. The bartender saw the man she left with that night, and when shown a picture of my husband, said no that was NOT the man she left with…….so why did they arrest him?? The description she gave of the “rapist” (if there was one) was of a man with a tattoo on his stomach, which my husband does not have, an earring, which my husband has never worn an earring, so why did they arrest my husband???? When shown a photo lineup of possible suspects, the woman recognized my husband and said she thinks he looks familiar……of course he LOOKED familiar, she was only kissing on him earlier that night about 4 shots of tequila earlier in her memory!

We know nothing about this woman except that the people who work at that bar roll their eyes and act as if her rape claims are crazy. Because of this crazy false accusation, my husband must sit in jail for at least the next 12 months waiting for his day in court (you cannot have bail when you are on parole) He is contemplating suicide and has been medicated in the jail and all I can do is sit in my house and wait for a collect phone call from him so I can try to encourage him and pray with him while I, myself, am dying inside, wheres the justice? How do I tell people, friends, my daughter’s classmates parents, where my new husband is? The only person who knows is our pastor and he encourages me without being judgemental. Why does society believe these woman? Why can’t some laws be passed to go after people who use accusations to tie up courts when it can be proven the accusations are false? I’m just so disheartened with our society now, I pray something will change for the better soon.

4 years ago i was falsely accused of indecent contact with 2 of 3 of my kids by my x wife.she is bi-polar,manic depresed with personality disorders,and yet i was railroaded by law enforcement.2 polygraphs,30,000dollars,4 years of grief im back where i was before.she is still mentally ill and in control.nobody and i mean nobody will help.i never went to trial ,charges were droped but the damage is already done.my kids were 3,4&5 at the time.and for 4 years she has been running me into the ground to them.what does a person do?what can i do?

Lets’ face it. What we’re seeing here is the swan song of heterosexual marriage. It’s being killed off with brutal efficiency. You can thank those lesbians who are outraged that THEY have been historically denied the right to get married, along with the greed of unscrupulous women and their equally slimy lawyers. They fuel this unfortunate phenomena any way they can.
The lawyer cop-out: “Hey, this is a no-win situation for the guy…might as well make some money off his misery anyway.
After my own outrageous experience with a deranged ex making false accusations against me and so deftly manipulating societal tools meant to protect women with LEGITIMATE concerns, I AM SO VERY GLAD I’VE NEVER MARRIED…and I’m in my late forties.
Need companionship? BE SMART, GUYS. GET A DOG!

Just today I was told by a friend that a man was seen hanging by the neck from a pine tree, in full view of rush hour traffic.
I’LL BET I KNOW WHY HE DID IT.

REMEDY:
BIG NUMBER ONE: Just keep “it” in your pants, guys.
2) Women who are overtly sexual always have something rattling loose in their brains. Avoid them at all cost, or else you’re injecting poison into your life.
3) Get over your fascination with bisexual women. They’re loonie-toons.
They can’t decide who or what they are. Doesn’t that tell you something?
4) If your woman ever confesses to you that she’s been abused, as soon as you can, EJECT HER FROM YOUR LIFE. She will certainly claim SHE was the victim, but there’s always TWO sides to the story. Also, she’s more likely to call the police on YOU for the slightest infraction due to her past experience.
5) Keep your eyes and ears open for the slightest indication of a controlling personality. If you sense this, ditch her!
6) DO NOT BECOME INTIMATE WITH FEMALE LAWYERS!!!!!!! ARE YOU CRAZY???
7) If she seems the slightest bit physical, lose her.
YOU’LL DISMISS ALL THIS AS B.S. UNTIL YOU FIND YOURSELF SITTING IN A TINY CELL WITH A 300# AXE MURDERER, YOUR RIGHTS STRIPPED AWAY, YOUR LIFE RUINED.
I’ll take no pleasure whatsoever in saying “I told you so!”.

Guys…
1) Face it. Sex was never meant to be YOUR domain, like the sea is the domain of a hungry, great white SHARK. THE WOMAN still typically give consent for sex. Don’t be a fool and believe otherwise.
2) WOMEN:
A. …GIVE CONSENT FOR MARRIAGE TO TAKE PLACE
B. …GIVE CONSENT FOR SEX TO TAKE PLACE
C. …GIVE CONSENT FOR BABY-MAKING TO TAKE PLACE.
Typically (and don’t whine, “but what about rape?!!!” to me…), women control all these things.
3) Don’t be fooled into thinking you have ANY SAY-SO in these matters.
A very famous female columnist once said, “Women think in very PRACTICAL terms in regards to marriage.”
Guys who date two- three women at once do so for a very healthy reason…to cull out the nut-jobs.

Our system today is screwed up. My father who raised my 3 sisters, 3 aunts, and their daughters in our home with my mother was convicted 5 years ago of child molestation and rape and received a life sentence. The false allegations made by my twin stepsisters out of spite for being punished have ruined our lives. They have gone on like nothing has happened. Our family couldn’t afford an attorney and therefor one was appointed by the state. Guess what, this guy never had been on a case like this as he only handled DUI’s. Although there was no evidence, and my step-sisters stories changed consisitently our father was still taken from us. Our whole family is in support of my father but no one can afford the cost it would take to have him free’d. My father a hard working man that would give you the shirt off his back, didn’t have a thing on his record and now he sits wasting away in a Washington state prison. And guess what? They say he’s one of the best prisoners they have never causes trouble, works…Model prisoner.

After reading your stories, I just wanted to chime in briefly…

First of all, my heart goes out to all of you who are suffering and struggling in the wake of cruel, unjust and malicious false accusations. I wish all of you the best as you work to rebuild your lives, reestablish your careers and reconnect with those close to you. I’m glad to see that there’s an organization like NCFM taking up mens’ issues. As a young man, you give me hope that there are people working toward a more just future.

My second comment is to Contessa…this world needs more people like you!!! Your comments here are articulate, insightful and heartfelt. I sincerely appreciate your advocacy and your dedication. Your husband should feel incredibly lucky to have you…I wish you both the best. Please keep up your amazing work!

I think what the biggest thing is that people A) Dont really get to know the person they are marrying BEFORE they get married. B) Are not willing to go thru counseling or work things out, marriage vows say “till death do us part” not “till a judge lets me out of the marriage” and C) the fact that so many people have to resort to violence and lies about others…God’s greatest commandment says ” Love one another as you would love yourself” EVERYONE needs to be willing to work things out, stop lying and start facing life and the challenges it brings and deal with it.

Don.. it takes 2 people to agree to have sex…dont make it as if the woman controls it all…the guy has to be involved as well. Guys have to learn how to keep it in their pants as well as woman not be so willing to sleep around….We need to get back to morals. No sex before marriage and get to know the person your marrying very very very well BEFORE you say those vows

Jill, your husband needs a lawyer for one. Second what was he doing in a bar and kissing some random broad after he was busted for dui after he was busted for stealing beer. How was he getting home from the bar, drive? He had no business being in the bar. I find it hard to believe that they arrested him on the “evidence” you speak of….and I find it also hard to believe hes on parole for stealing beer. You have to be not sharing something about him….

Take a look at my latest at;
http://www.daveyonefamilylawman.blogspot.com/
Best wishes
Davey

Hello All,

I am the current girlfriend (1.5 yrs) of a man who is being falsely accused of DV by his ex and mother of his 7 year old child. This woman who is actually the abuser, put a RO against him back in April 2008 after following him around town until she found him at a gas station where he stopped because he thought he had lost her. She then (5′10″ and probably over 200lbs) jumped him, bit and scratched him, and broke his laptop after getting it out of the car. All this while their daughter looked on from her vehicle and people at the station witnessed on. Someone called the police and when they arrived, she accussed him of beating her but thankfully for him people attested to the contrary and she ended up getting arrested. He bailed her out and to his surprise that was his worse mistake: she went back to police station and accussed him of beating her and they went and arrested him. He who had just bailed her out for assaulting him in front of a bunch of other people! She also accussed him of assaulting their child and got DSS involved. Its been the same story ever since, she follows him around, calls him incessantly, leaves him messages threatening him, vandalizes his property, shows up at his house/job or his sisters house if he doesnt pick up her calls, has accussed him of violating RO which has landed him in jail, he is currently out on $6000 bail. She also coupled up with her sister who accussed him of assaulting her and thru a bogus witness was able to also get a RO against him. And now if either of them even sees him on the street, they follow him and call the police. Yesterday actually, the siter saw a friend of his at a barber shop and immediately went to police and accussed him of violating the RO more than a week ago. A warrant for his arrest was issued and now all he thinks about is killing himself because he doesnt know how he’s going to be able to get rid of all the problems without having to go to jail first and having an even longer rap sheet, all due to this woman’s obsession with him. She says she rather see him dead than with another woman.
What I would like to know is, what can he do to defend himself from all these bogus claims and get all these charges dropped? If he has proof that she is falsely accussing him as well as her sister, can any charges be brought against them? Can he too get a RO against them both? He has eye witnesses, text messages, emails, voice mails, recordings (audio and camera)of her following him and screaming obsceneties at him and his phone records that show that she is the one to call not the other way around. He asked for a RO back in July 09 after she showed up where he used to work and again assaulted him in front of his boss, coworkers and customers and then started slapping their child as an example of what happens when he doesnt pick up her calls but got denied. This has gotten way out of hand and i would like to somehow find a way to help him and put an end to this crazy woman’s madness.

Thanks,

Gigi

NCFM:

I commend you for standing up and speaking out on behalf of men everywhere. I applaud your recent press release calling Rihanna to come forth and own some accountability in the unfortunate chain of events leading up to her assault earlier this year.

I am a 37 year-old African-American woman with 3 brothers so I have seen many Rihannas come and go. I cannot begin to count the number of times I have witnessed instances when my brothers, friends, neighbors, etc. have been pushed away from their homes, taken to jail, or forced to withstand verbal and physical abuse from women. In at least half of those instances, the women perpetrated or escalated the entire episode.

Like NCFM, I am not condoning Chris’ behavior but I am undeniably standing behind your message to her and to the public. Again, I commend you for your words.

Thank you!

Saleemah A. Green, M. Ed
Cincinnati, OH

False allegations of domestic violence have been made against myself. I can only say that this crime should be made a felony with jail time. It costs several thousand dollars to defend against such false statements and injures innocent people. Not to mention wastes
the time of the Court. The tactic is well known to Judges, attorneys and law enforcement officials.

I too am married to a man who has been wrongly accused of abuse. During their marriage she was always the aggressor. After he and I got married and she found out I was pregnant, she started to get worse with her antics. My husband decided to take her back to court for more visitation. She was told by her attorney and his that my husband “would” get more time. She stated that she would not allow that and if she had it her way, he wouldn’t be in the girls lives at all. Two days later she called the police accusing him of physically abusing the oldest girl. We hired an attorney and went to court. She had coached her daughter on what to say. At 5 she said “my mommy told me to tell you that daddy put bruises on my bottom” On top of that, in court she also testified that her mommy told her to say those things and that my husband was her step-daddy. Fortunately, the jurors saw the lies and my husband was aquitted. But that was only part of it. During these two years, my husband only got to see the girls supervised for 4 hours a month in which the youngest who had just turned 3 at the time would say to my husband “mommy says that you don’t love us because you put bruises on sissy’s bottom”. He had to go through anger management and parenting classes, which he completed all of them. Then he had to go through court again for reunification therapy before the girls were allowed back in our home. Since they have been in our home, she has taken him back to court 2 more times. The most recent was to try and have the extra time he was given taken away because she thought that we ate macaroni and cheese for dinner every night. The judge ordered them to go to co-parenting. I think she realized that she was going to lose more time, because she found a way to manipulate the system again and stop the proceedings. She came to the house to pick up the girls and left. She then came back to the house to start an arguement with my husband. When she didn’t win the arguement, she went home and then called the police to say that my husband assaulted her. Two days later at their next co-parenting appointment she played the victim, co-parenting was stopped, a copy of the police report was requested and everything sits in limbo.

Hopefully things work in our favor and she is seen for the liar she is. It appears that the police report shows her the aggressor since she left and then came back to our home and my husband never left the doorstep. Also, the officer reported that she showed him how my husband supposedly grabbed her but the way in which she did seemed to be suspect as it left marks that she claimed my husband left. When he went to the car to get the camera to take pictures, he came back and the marks on her arms were gone. No pictures were taken even though she claimed to the co-parenting therapist that pictures were taken.

Our only hope is that the when the therapist gets a copy of the police report that it becomes apparent to the therapist that his ex is again making an attempt to interfer with our visits and my husbands rights as a father.

I hope the therapist recommends the psychological evaluation that she needs and sweet justice would be that the DA actually persues a false police report against her.

It is unfortunate that we will always have to be on our guard around her and that we still have 12 years to deal with the sociopath.

There is one thing that stands as an enemy to innocent men and women;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Go7cyTlao04

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6lIurF3wA4&feature=related

Please forgive the music.

If this is the case of False Accusation,
how about a law to be passed on people who accuse and it turns out not to be true, or a person who accuse and not show for court after this accused person is jailed and losses his job, and is humiliated. Also the accused person probably loss all respect and love of him or herself because of this issue. Thats why I think that there should be a law for this and other types of situation.
Even crazier, the person who is accused, and won his case on Lack of Prosecution,Lack of Evidence,not guilty, and etc., does not get to have is case expunged becuase the Commonwealth of that State wants to challenge your expungement.

Please help me into turning these situations in a law!

my ex filed a restraining order on me that i havent been served with ,since shes filed shes contacted me several times doesnt that render the restraining order void?

I’ve been dealing with this false accusation ordeal for 2 1/2 years with my son. His girlfriend at the time was breaking up and going back with her ex and she claimed false accusations on him… he was convicted on circumstantial evidence only and the attorney that was hired died 3 months before the trial. He ended up with an inexperienced attorney from the firm. It was horrible… there was NO defense at all. Out of ignorance the family did not know what to do… or if there was anything that could be done. Now, the appeal opportunity is over… and the family is lost.. any help would be great.

FAKE

False Allegations Kill Everyone

All the time, every time

Ron Belec NCFM Seattle

I stumbled upon this website, looking for resources for my falsely accused brother. (Accused of “sexual imposition- touching a girl’s stomach). This girl waited 4 months to report anything, and did not exhibit any symptoms/reactions typical of a girl that has been sexually assaulted.

To the feminists (such as myself) out there I say this: False allegations/the propensity to adopt a “women don’t lie about sex” mentality negates the very essence of “equal rights”. A true feminist ideal is for -complete equality-. A level playing field on all accounts; this includes in a court of law.

Additionally, for *every, single* false allegation, a girl somewhere (that has truly been grievously assaulted) is undermined. We’ll revert back to the days when women don’t come forward at all- because too many have cried wolf. As a feminist, this should offend your sensibilities to the core!!

My son has been going through this for 6 years We have 2 beautiful children w this sick woman. She is now remarried 4th time.we go to trail in 4 weeks I was wondering does any one know where you would find someone that has been through false allegations of DV to testify I think this could be very helpful for alot these cases Ive found people in general dont believe woman would or could lie about such things please help I think she has BPD every symtom of the illness we are up against alot she has to be stopped mm

If any man has been through false allegations of DV and has been successful please email me details berryislegirl@gmail.com

Bull. Shit.

Every rapist’s defense is “she wanted it” or “she was asking for it” or “she enjoyed it”.

Rape isn’t a feminist invention meant to try and make a man’s life harder. Rape and abuse happen. More often than ANY gender would like to believe or accept. Not to mention most abuse is never even reported because the abuser keeps the victim is constant fear.

I think the people on this website need to grow up and accept that you can’t bully women – or anyone for that matter – into doing what you want by whining about how “unfair” you think it is that you can’t have your way with everything in a skirt.

Get over it. Seriously.

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Hello, I understand the feeling. I am going through this right now. I found out that my wife was cheating on me, after trying to convince her to go with me to counseling, she refused. Then when I called and confronted the man she was cheating on me with because I found his number on the phone bill. I filed for divorce and I found myself, being issued an order of protection against me, falsely accused of harrassment and stalking, arrested and now I have to hire an attorney to defend myself in criminal court next week for aggravated harrassment, stalking, and even physical abuse when I never even laid a finger on her. By the way her attorney’s fees are free because she is working through a woman’s advocacy group. Then to top it all off, after the order of protection was issued, she goes a invitro fertilzation center to try and get pregnant with the man she left me for, using my health insurance.
I feel the system is totally against men and that women can use the system to maliciously prosecute men just to be vengeful. CAN ANYONE HELP ME. JOSE FROM NYC.

The only thing I despise more than a rapist is a woman who lies about being raped.

A woman who lies about this is truly selfish and ignorant. Our “foremothers” fought very hard to help put laws in place to protect women and girls and these are the women that take advantage of it.

Real rape victims go through so much horror with the legal system and with society in general. Their validity is always questioned. These women who lie do nothing but set us back many generations.

Makaela Says:

February 28th, 2010 at 11:45 am
Bull. Shit.

Every rapist’s defense is “she wanted it” or “she was asking for it” or “she enjoyed it”.

Rape isn’t a feminist invention meant to try and make a man’s life harder. Rape and abuse happen. More often than ANY gender would like to believe or accept. Not to mention most abuse is never even reported because the abuser keeps the victim is constant fear.

I think the people on this website need to grow up and accept that you can’t bully women – or anyone for that matter – into doing what you want by whining about how “unfair” you think it is that you can’t have your way with everything in a skirt.

Get over it. Seriously.

————————————-

You are waaaaay out of line. Take your feminist banter to a site where it is welcome, like feministing.com.

This is the very kind of attitude that would falsely accuse someone.Your IGNORANCE speaks for itself.You go girl…lol

Just got back from court. An 11 year old girl began calling and texting my 15 yr old son. Had a bad crush on him. He had a girlfriend, didn’t think this girl was cute, and found her to be a total nuisance. I told him just be nice to her because she was just a little kid, but let her know he had a girlfriend and that she was too young for him to consider being anything but friends. After trying to change his mind for 3 months, she finally got mad at him for not giving in and because I blocked her number at his request. That night she told her older cousins he sent her sexual texts and tried to seduce her (by phone since they have never been in the same location in person!) They assaulted him, causing over $4,000 in medical bills. Then her mother pressed charges against my son for text stalking and electronic molestation (no lie – that is what the subpoena said). Result: The two cousins received two years probation and must pay restitution. The girl changed her story three times, then finally recanted her statements under oath and said she “exaggerated his comments to her”. The charges against him were dropped, but with prejudice because the judge wouldn’t look at our evidence (phone records showing the girl initiated EVERY contact and when I finally blocked her number)stating she “didn’t believe an 11 year old girl could concoct such allegations” unless my son had shown “some level of disrespect”. So a little girl lies and a completely innocent teenager now has a file with a charge that can be resurrected at any time until he is 18. UNBELIEVABLE!!!

I am the girlfriend of a man who has an ex-wife that is very abusive to him – both physically and emotionally.

Because of financial issues, they still unfortunately live under the same roof. They have two children together under the age of ten.

They have been divorced for almost two years now and he and I have been together for 7 months. He is awaiting a settlement and plans to move out depending on the outcome of this settlement.

She worries me very much. Every day she is hitting him. She punches him, pushes him, kicks him, scratches him. She cuts up his clothes, jackets, underwear. She has even taken the knife to his mattress.

He has a lot of physical problems, I.E. ongoing problems from work related injuries and whatnot. He has a herniated disk between his 5th & 6th vertabra which in return sends shooting pains down his shoulder and arm all the way to his fingertips. She will haul off and punch him right in his neck, back and/or shoulder.

He just recently had surgery to repair a bi-lateral hernia problem. Before and after the surgery, she would kick and punch him in his abdomen/groin area. She would actually wake him up by kicking him (they sleep in separate rooms) in his stomach.

She also harrasses/stalks him big time. His cell is his only telephone and she will call him 10, 20, 30 times in a row and fill up his voice mail with hateful messages.

He has mentioned many times that he is going to call the police on her. To date – he hasn’t. I realize how embarrassing and humiliating this must be for him. He is a man. A strong man. He can handle the pain she inflicts on him. That is similar to what he thinks. I have wanted to call the police on her before and he has begged me not to for his kids’ sakes.

I am seriously worried about him. He knows I am. I have cried to him about how worried I am about him. He has a hearing date coming up next week in regards to his pending settlement and his ex is acting up worse and worse each day that comes closer to that. It’s like she knows the “end” is really coming. She is sooooo controlling that in her mind, there is no way he will ever leave her, I.E. move out.

I’m scared to death that she is going to really seriously injure him. Just a couple of days ago she stabbed his mattress and cut it up (he wasn’t in the bed, but it sends chills down my spine the thought if he was….) I mean, this woman is off.

She came by my house a couple of weeks ago and rang my bell and said she wanted me to buzz her up so she can talk to him. I told her that I thought that wasn’t a good idea. She replied “WHY???? I’M HIS WIFE!!” I told her no your not and you need to go home and take care of your kids he’s with me now. She said something else and I told her that if she didn’t leave there was going to be major problems.

She left.

She tried using intimidation and manipulation with me. Neither worked.

But that just goes to show her controlling manner. She’s used to wiping her feet all over him. I, however, will not tolerate that behavior. Which I have already voiced to her.

I’m not looking for any advice. I am just venting. I am well aware of my situation with this man. I love him and he loves me and we plan on staying together. But my God, it is so difficult dealing with a crazy ex. I just hope and pray that she doesn’t kill him.

Wow, Maekala, I had no idea I wanted my way with everything in a skirt! I’m a lesbian and I didn’t even know it.

So what you’re saying is that even the women here just want other women? I’m am just SOOOOOOOOOO pining away for you, Maekala. May I have your phone number please? I’ll buy you some Midol.

I consider myself a feminist, in that I believe in equality. I too, was arrested on false charges, and my life is in shambles.
The problem started when I was the only female cab driver in town, and was being pursued by another cabbie, who is a drug-dealer. I politely declined several times, and when he found out I was dating someone else, retaliated against me by getting all the cabbies to sexually harass me. The harassment was extreme, egregious and humiliating. I complained to the owner of the company, but he defended the drug dealer and often participated in harassing me himself. The owner of the cab company and most of the cabbies are middle-eastern and I was constantly told “all American women are whores.” This went on for a year and a half before I finally told the lot of them that if they did not stop it, I would file suit. Instead of stopping, they retaliated even more by threatening me verbally and physically, and stalking me. They terrorized me to the point I ended up in counseling. I went to the police 3 times, unaware that the police were being sued for sexual harassment by their fellow female officers, and that they had retaliated against the female officers by falsly accusing them, and turned them into Internal Affairs on bogus charges. So instead of helping me, the police yelled at me, told me that I was “probably asking for it” and then tipped off the cabbies, so that I was retaliated against again. Eventually someone told me that the police and the cabbies were conspiring to sabotage my sexual harassment case. I do wish to say that I did not want to file a suit, I just wanted them to stop it.
A couple of weeks later, one of the cabbies chased me down and tried to punch me. Then he bit his own lip and called the police, and told them that I punched him in the face, which was a complete lie. The police made me sit in my car alone while they and the cabbies made up an absurd story that I beat up 2 men. Then they made me get out of the car and handcuffed me in front of the harassers to humiliate me. I was not allowed to tell MY side of the story, or even talk at all. The police took away my Hackney license, so I lost my job. Then they threw me in a jail cell. I have never been in trouble in my life, but I was treated like a criminal.
There is a police surveillance camera on the cab stand, but the police refused to hand over the videotape. I filed a motion in court for the videotape, and the judge also refused the motion. Then the police destroyed the videotape to cover up that they filed false police reports and arrested me on false charges. The police officers even used fake names on their reports.
I have a severe medical condition that requires me to wear hand-splints, and had several rounds of physical and occupational therapy, so it is impossible for me to punch anyone, however, my medical records were completely ignored.
I had called the District Attorney a month prior to my arrest(and I have the phone records to prove it), pleading for protection from these creeps, but the DA wouldn’t help me. Instead, the DA began threatening to take away my house and give it to these jerks if I didn’t agree to probation.
I filed charges against these guys for filing false police reports, but since they are being backed by the police, they are being “taken care of” and don’t even have to show up for court. The DA refuses to assign me a prosecutor. They also don’t have to show up for Civil court, either.
It is amazing that the DA was willing to prosecute me on no evidence whatsoever, yet refused to prosecute them for filing false police reports, in spite of OVERWHELMING evidence to back this up.
I had to sit in court and listen to everyone call these jerks “victims.”
I nearly lost my home to foreclosure because I couldn’t get a job because I now have an arrest record. My formerly perfect credit is now ruined. It has been 6 years and I still have nightmares. I have lost all faith in the so-called “Justice” system, and regard police officers as thugs. I feel frightened every time I leave my house. I no longer date because I feel revulsion towards men.
You men are not the only victims in this game. False accusations are the way to win in court.

Cheryl
I am for equality and I am not a feminist. To me equality is a very old human desire. Call me a humanist.

False accusation is indeed a cheap shot. It is a way to ruin the accused. So far the cost to the false accuser has been very low. In a criminal trial the accused (you) has only the security that the conclusion is upto a jury of “your” peers. And all of us who played “telephone” as kids know the game can be very scary if you had to trust your life to those kids. This is particularly true when you know your innocent and the best you can imagine from a jury of your peers is 50 : 50. But having lost your house and job, you know that the cost is huge even if you win.

Move this to a non-criminal trial where there is no jury and no “beyond a reasonable doubt”. Imagine that it is not a few thugs in cabs against your gender, but the judge. Suppose that judge is the product of 40 years worth of “training” against your gender. Suppose they (the judge) has already taken your house, is making you pay for it, and you have already lost your job. Then you might already have surmised that you’re screwed. What do you have to live for? Well, did you leave out anything? What about your kids? Was there something more valuable to you, maybe more valuable than your life? Well the “judge” doesn’t care about your kids, or your life, only your gender and her feminist politics and that she and her friends are paid. So you will pay, and pay and pay. You will run yourself silly into debt, more debt than you could ever imagine. All of this because you know your kids are more important than anything. You may already know that the odds are against you 10 to 1, but your kids are all that is left.

The judge doesn’t care, because she is against your gender. At least now you know what screwed is.

Cheryl, I’m so sorry for your experience. No, as time goes on and persons of either gender who lack morals and integrity discover that they can lie with impunity, we will see an increase in false accusations. That’s why it’s so important to support NCFM.

Making false accusations: Not just for women anymore. But false accusations of rape, DV, incest, etc. against men are the most common. It’s tragic.

Petition Supporting Anonymity For Rape Defendants

Men around the world who are falsely and wrongly accused of the loathsome crime of rape suffer all manner of appalling harm, including murder, suicide, beatings, the deprivation of employment, and the loss of their good names, due to the unconscionable stigmatization that accompanies the publicity of such accusations.

We, the members of the world community concerned about the rights and dignity of those who have been falsely and wrongly accused of rape and related offenses, call upon the governments of the world, and news agencies and outlets everywhere, to grant anonymity to the presumptively innocent who have been charged with rape and related offenses, which anonymity should be lifted only upon a conviction for such charge.

We specifically support the UK Government’s May 2010 proposal to grant anonymity to defendants in rape cases, and we oppose those efforts to block the proposal for the reasons stated here: http://falserapesociety.blogspot.com/2010/06/refutation-of-motion-opposing-anonymity.html

Please click here and sign

http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/anonymity/#signForm

Do NOT sign this petition. It will do nothing but enable serial rapists to rape even more victims.

Google “Biela in Reno NV”

Google the Duke lacrosse and Hofstra cases.

Friday, June 11, 2010
Sexual assault nurse’s erroneous findings might have helped convict innocent men of sexual assault

http://www.goerie.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100608/NEWS02/306079920/-1/news

http://falserapesociety.blogspot.com/2010/06/sexual-assault-nurses-erroneous.html

I can add a few words here. I know false accusations have often times killed the innocent. Remember this, I have reread my post. I have read other posts. Now I am beginning to see the light. There are towns and circles of friends who often time associate with their circles or another circle of buddies. Now getting to the point. False Rape cases are always gonna cost the every dime out of taxpayers because of selfishness, greed, and pure ungratification.

I have seen tides turn toward the accusers, these tides are known like children turning against the accusers of their paternal parent. Remember this, You cannot do wrong and expect to come out right all time. I can tell you that its going to cause more strife later on down the line.

In conclusion, I am humble to acknowledge that Contessa is a model woman standing up for the rights of innocent men who suffers daily from depression from hearing in court over false allegations from the accuser. Most people do not realize after this life. There is another judge that is impartial, no lawyer will be able to plead your case. You will have to answer for everything done in past life. Remember this, No one can escape revenge or injustice. Even the judges that are harsh on the male will have to answer to the judge in judgement day.

Picture in your mind gentlemen, the other side where there is streets of gold, water so pure you do not have to worry about chemicals, Houses you do not have to worry about maintenance and one God who is loving, caring, and more of all the compassionate.

These times will come where the current system is going to be replaced with the biblical system that is impartial. Just because the da can prosecute cases based on lies and deceit, will win in todays courts because of the special relationship with the judge. The facts are often times ignored.

Remember, victims are the small children and the innocent parents suffering the evil doings of the feminist movement. I hope one day, D.C. will abolish the NOW, and other racist organisation that contribute to hate, and dissolution to traditional family values. We as a nation need to rebuild stronger. For the children, whippings do no harm but, make stronger parental models. fathers and mothers who do not whip their kids will have barbarian kids or sociopathic adults. it has been proven in today’s society. I can say that one of these days, everyone will look around and find majority of the problems with false rape and other false allegations will vaporize. Its going to take time.

Majority of the male victims, hang on tight on what sanity you have, you will come out a winner. Female victims, I do not know if you are telling the truth. I think that you are just throwing a pity party to discredit this site. It will not work. I am to a male victim who have experienced a huge recovery mode of being the victor. One of these days, the tide will turn. Til then, hang on tight. It will get better.

False Allegations of Domestic Violence is ruining my life, my life is upside down.

first of all lets be peace on earth and love one another..all my life was struggling and helpful person and understandable.
the story is ,really tragic and scary.
I been lock up by false accusation of this family and destroy my personality and telling lies to the government that,i am bad person and threatening them…i am still trying to fix this case..god bless u all.
love help me and help everyone who is honest…

Just wanted to remind folks I’m still here as is the “Team” and still kicking rear on false allegations, and custody cases particularly interstate and international cases.

now,I am still scared because of those people making up stories and false accusation through me.i have peace order and accept the judge order because he said no contact only until i sign w/o knowing the conclusion.
here comes this people making those horrible stories that,i climb in the night and went to the house but i didn’t try that because for what reason and I am a man with honor and respect for human kind.
I hope good people and good judges knows about the case well before believing the allegations….

I wish we all human being have a big heart and
follow the law of god.
dont destroy the opportunity of our life and life is precious that supposed we care.
now my life change at all,i am now scared all the time and,I dont wanna trust anymore to the people that,i dont really know.pls pray for me to be happy again and helpful person and respectful…i love god as ,I love human being…

@Texas Tomcat,

Thanks so much for the kind words. There’s nothing special about me at all. I readily admit that I might not have understood any of this were I not living it.

Being married to a falsely accused man is not easy and I become despondent at times myself. There is a lot I do without and I’m not always cheerful about it….LOL. But he is a wonderful man, just scarred from the horrors of the accusations and I love him very much.

I am begging for your help. My husband is dealing with an ex who is psychopathic and we have just went through the worst 5 months of our lives. She accused him in February of sexually touching his daughter who is 5 which was an absolute lie and thrown out in court because the judge seen right through her. Now she has told us she is on a mission to destroy us and this is just the tip of the iceberg. We have tried to seek help with Children and Youth and the local police but have just been told good luck you will need it. Is there any one out there who has been in this situation and can give us any direction on what to do, if so it would be greatly appreciated. Please email me at pjbagley@comast.net. Thank you so much.

False accusation is a very bad thing for any one who is being accused. Only a person can feel that bad impression. This leads to a person makes angry whether he fails to his mental condition or take revenge after when they get free.